how to show compassion to others essay

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The impact of helping others – a deep dive into the benefits of providing support to those in need.

Compassion is a virtue that ignites the flames of kindness and empathy in our hearts. It is an innate human quality that has the power to bring light into the lives of those in need. When we extend a helping hand to others, we not only uplift their spirits but also nourish our own souls. The act of kindness and compassion resonates in the depths of our being, reminding us of the interconnectedness and shared humanity we all possess.

In a world that can sometimes be filled with hardships and struggles, the power of compassion shines like a beacon of hope. It is through offering a listening ear, a comforting embrace, or a simple gesture of kindness that we can make a profound impact on someone else’s life. The ripple effect of compassion is endless, as the seeds of love and understanding we sow in others’ hearts continue to grow and flourish, spreading positivity and light wherever they go.

The Significance of Compassionate Acts

Compassionate acts have a profound impact on both the giver and the receiver. When we extend a helping hand to others in need, we not only alleviate their suffering but also experience a sense of fulfillment and purpose. Compassion fosters a sense of connection and empathy, strengthening our bonds with others and creating a more caring and supportive community.

Moreover, compassionate acts have a ripple effect, inspiring others to pay it forward and perpetuate kindness. One small act of compassion can set off a chain reaction of positive deeds, influencing the world in ways we may never fully realize. By showing compassion to others, we contribute to a more compassionate and understanding society, one that values empathy and kindness above all else.

Understanding the Impact

Helping others can have a profound impact not only on those receiving assistance but also on the individuals providing help. When we lend a hand to someone in need, we are not just offering material support; we are also showing compassion and empathy . This act of kindness can strengthen bonds between individuals and foster a sense of community .

Furthermore, helping others can boost our own well-being . Studies have shown that acts of kindness and generosity can reduce stress , improve mood , and enhance overall happiness . By giving back , we not only make a positive impact on the lives of others but also nourish our own souls .

Benefits of Helping Others

There are numerous benefits to helping others, both for the recipient and for the giver. Here are some of the key advantages:

• Increased feelings of happiness and fulfilment
• Improved mental health and well-being
• Building stronger connections and relationships with others
• Reduced stress levels and improved self-esteem
• Promoting a sense of purpose and meaning in life
• Contributing to a more compassionate and caring society

By helping others, we not only make a positive impact on the world around us but also experience personal growth and benefits that can enhance our overall happiness and well-being.

Empathy and Connection

Empathy plays a crucial role in our ability to connect with others and understand their experiences. When we practice empathy, we put ourselves in someone else’s shoes and try to see the world from their perspective. This act of compassion allows us to build a connection based on understanding and mutual respect.

By cultivating empathy, we can bridge the gap between different individuals and communities, fostering a sense of unity and solidarity. Empathy helps us recognize the humanity in others, regardless of their background or circumstances, and promotes a culture of kindness and inclusivity.

Through empathy, we not only show compassion towards those in need but also create a supportive environment where everyone feels valued and understood. It is through empathy that we can truly make a difference in the lives of others and build a more compassionate society.

Spreading Positivity Through Kindness

One of the most powerful ways to help others is by spreading positivity through acts of kindness. Kindness has the remarkable ability to brighten someone’s day, lift their spirits, and create a ripple effect of happiness in the world.

Simple gestures like giving a compliment, lending a helping hand, or sharing a smile can make a significant impact on someone’s life. These acts of kindness not only benefit the recipient but also bring a sense of fulfillment and joy to the giver.

When we choose to spread positivity through kindness, we contribute to building a more compassionate and caring society. By showing empathy and understanding towards others, we create a supportive environment where people feel valued and respected.

Kindness is contagious and has the power to inspire others to pay it forward, creating a chain reaction of goodwill and compassion. By incorporating acts of kindness into our daily lives, we can make a positive difference and help create a better world for all.

Creating a Ripple Effect

When we extend a helping hand to others, we set off a chain reaction that can have a profound impact on the world around us. Just like a stone thrown into a calm pond creates ripples that spread outward, our acts of compassion can touch the lives of many, inspiring them to do the same.

By showing kindness and empathy, we not only make a difference in the lives of those we help but also create a ripple effect that can lead to positive change in our communities and beyond. A small gesture of kindness can ignite a spark of hope in someone’s heart, motivating them to pay it forward and spread compassion to others.

Each act of generosity and care has the power to create a ripple effect that can ripple outwards, reaching far beyond our immediate circles. As more and more people join in this chain of kindness, the impact multiplies, creating a wave of positivity that can transform the world one small act of kindness at a time.

Building a Stronger Community

One of the key benefits of helping others is the positive impact it can have on building a stronger community. When individuals come together to support one another, whether it’s through acts of kindness, volunteering, or simply being there for someone in need, it fosters a sense of unity and connection. This sense of community helps to create a supportive and caring environment where people feel valued and respected.

By helping others, we also set an example for those around us, inspiring others to also lend a hand and contribute to the well-being of the community. This ripple effect can lead to a chain reaction of kindness and generosity that can ultimately make the community a better place for everyone.

Furthermore, when people feel supported and cared for by their community, they are more likely to be happier and healthier, both mentally and physically. This sense of belonging and connection can help to reduce feelings of isolation and loneliness, and can improve overall well-being.

In conclusion, building a stronger community through helping others is essential for creating a more positive and caring society. By coming together and supporting one another, we can create a community that is resilient, compassionate, and unified.

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23 Ways to Show Compassion to Others Throughout Your Life

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The challenges of life affect us all regardless of age, gender, ethnicity, social status, or economic background. Each of us can use assistance or words of encouragement during such trying times.

I frequently encounter family members, people from my social connections – even strangers – who single me out to disclose personal problems or ask for help. I often wondered why.   Do I seem like a compassionate person?

Sometimes, all people need is a little compassion … but not everyone knows how to show it.

If you’re one of them… you're in the right place! If you're trying to understand what it means to be compassionate and how to show compassion to yourself and others in practical ways… we’ve got the answer.  Just keep reading. 

Table of Contents

What Is Compassion?

Compassion comes from the Latin word, “compati” and literally means “suffer with.” Compassionate people have the ability to show concern for the misfortunes of others. It could be anyone, adult or child, who's in trouble, sick, hungry, unhoused, or has some other unmet need. When confronted with the struggles, sufferings, or failures of others, they feel strongly motivated, almost compelled, to emotionally take on their “pain” or ease the burden.

The Difference Between Compassion and Empathy

As with empathy, not everyone knows how to show compassion. Compassion is a personality trait that develops through nurture, but you can still learn it as an adult. They both encompass being mindful of someone's needs and willing to help in whatever way you can. Having empathy, or understanding how another person feels , usually makes it easier for you to show compassion.

Why It's Important to be Compassionate

Displaying compassion can help improve the current mental or physical state, feelings, or situation of someone else. Offering a hug or a word of encouragement, in that moment of crisis, can positively change the lives of those who feel vulnerable . They may feel motivated to find solutions they haven't considered because of their current mental state.

Although you cannot save the world, you can play your individual role in making the world a better place. I found that the more I helped improve someone's life, the more motivated I was to help others. Through kind acts, you can inspire others' faith in humanity and they, too, may go on to help others. You're also paying it forward.

How to Show Compassion to Yourself

Self-compassion means showing yourself love and kindness the same way you do for others. Ironically, big-hearted people often unintentionally overlook the need to address their personal sufferings. These self-compassion tips are bound to help you be kinder toward yourself.

1. Recognize you, too, are human

Everyone makes mistakes, some bigger than others. If your spouse or friend made similar mistakes, you may even tell them, “To err is human,” so they can feel better about themselves. Recognize that this same proverb applies to you. It may just so happen that you're not around people who can assure you that we all mess up from time to time. At times like these, you'll need to be your biggest cheerleader and biggest fan.

2. Quit beating up on yourself

You're quick to comfort others when they make mistakes, fail, or feel hurt. Rather than judging them harshly, you soothe and encourage them. Yet, you judge yourself harshly and carry around self-blame, guilt, or shame. Harsh self-criticism or self-bullying can erode your peace of mind and self-esteem. Stop being so hard on yourself. Be your best friend, not your harshest critic.

3. Acknowledge your struggles

It seems easy to just ignore the obstacles or negative emotions you face. Unprocessed emotions will remain there until they are properly dealt with. Catch yourself in the moment and admit that you're having a really difficult time.

Next, think of healthy ways to comfort yourself. Repeating affirmations such as, “I accept myself for who I am, regardless of my shortcomings,” helps reinforce seeing yourself in a positive light.

4. Forgive yourself

Our relationship with ourselves sets the pace for relationships with others. Self-forgiveness means to quit punishing yourself for missteps. It allows you to let go, something that helps bring healing and peace of mind. People may be more willing to “bury the hatchet” with you because you don't hold grudges against yourself.

5. Accept that you're not perfect

You cannot get exactly what you want 100% of the time. Denial of this reality is a source of frustration, self-criticism, stress, and persistent personal dissatisfaction. I often say to myself, “I love how perfectly imperfect I am,” and even laugh at myself when I mess up. Taking this perspective enables you to be kinder and more gentle with yourself whenever you miss the mark.

6. Practice mindfulness

The tendency to ruminate and worry about the present, past, and future is linked to anxiety. Mindfulness is a form of meditation that challenges you to live in the present moment. One of the principles is accepting things for what they are, which can lessen your tendency to self-judge or put negative labels on your thoughts, emotions, and feelings.

How to Show Compassion to Others

Thinking about the well-being of others is closely linked to selflessness. However, you don't need to show it only when someone is hurt or experiencing setbacks. You can be proactive by anticipating the person's needs and meeting them before they ask. You can take preventative action to protect them from harm. This is called distal compassion .

7. Show them kindness

“Kindness makes the world go round.” (Mark Twain) Perform random acts of kindness whenever time permits. Offer to care for your kids while your wife takes a nap or help a friend move into their new home. Extend your generosity to your neighbors and co-workers. It can be something as simple as agreeing to do your neighbor's grocery shopping if they are ill or immobile.

8. Respect their boundaries

Make it your duty to respect people's wishes. By this, you're conveying that you're not a boundary-crasher. If your co-worker says they prefer not to hug or decline your help, respectfully accept and don't push it. That's perhaps the most compassionate thing you can do in the circumstances. You did nothing wrong. Pride and not feeling deserving of kindness can cause some individuals to refuse help.

9. Offer hope

Telling someone something like, “It's going to get better,” is one way to inspire hope. Assuring them that you're there for them is another compassionate thing to say. I've recently been reassuring a friend that she'll overcome the initial challenges of being a single mom. Her husband died suddenly, leaving her with three young children. Words of hope can literally be a lifesaver for those on the brink of giving up . 

10. Support their dreams

Chances are you've experienced telling someone your goals and dreams for success, only to be told, “You're gonna fail!” It's a deeply painful thing to hear and can shatter your self-esteem. Listen to your children or spouse when they share their life goals. Let them know they have what it takes to achieve them. Tell them you'll support them all the way.

11. Validate their feelings

Validating someone else's feelings shows them what they're saying or how they're feeling matters. Some people, like narcissists, are experts at minimizing how you feel. They'll blame you for your emotions over their wrongdoings and tell you to “Get over it.” When you listen and accept that your parent or friend has a right to think or feel a certain way, you make them feel heard, understood, and valued as an individual .

12. Forgive them

As the saying goes, “Revenge is a dish best served cold.” Counter that suggestion by believing forgiveness is the virtue that will heal your wound. Revenge will just make you feel more miserable and not proud of yourself. I know you may want to hurt them back, so they can feel how you feel. Instead, be quick to forgive and show mercy the same way you want others to do for you. Choosing forgiveness is a healthy way to cope and let go of anger or resentment towards the wrongdoer.

How to Show Compassion to Strangers and the Poor

People who are authentically compassionate treat strangers just as well as they treat loved ones. Here are examples of ways to practice humanity toward strangers or the poor.

13. Don't judge them

“ He must have been a terrible man when he was young, no wonder he's homeless.” That's something someone who lacks compassion will likely say.

Anyone can end up homeless. Whether it's a homeless person or someone faced with other types of adversities, offer help or a kind word if you can. But don't judge.

14. Don't criticize

People are naturally wired to avoid negative criticism. You may understand how it feels if someone criticized you before. Criticisms include identifying, judging, and labeling someone's flaws. Calling someone “lazy” or saying, “You're terrible at this job!” are examples of negative criticisms. These labels make people feel devalued, inadequate, or unworthy.

15. Talk to them kindly

Because it's a stranger does not mean it's okay to talk down to them. Be mindful of your tone, choice of words, and facial expressions. Communicate in a respectful way, even when you're providing help. Give them your full attention, don't interrupt, and respond using encouraging or motivational words.

16. Advocate on their behalf

Speak up or stand up for a child who's being bullied or an adult who's being taken advantage of. Stepping in, instead of looking on or recording a video of the scene, can prevent a crime from happening. A person might be overlooked for a social benefit because they're unable to speak English. If you're bilingual, step in and offer to interpret on their behalf.

17. Offer helpful resources

There are people in vulnerable situations who don't know how to get help. A woman in an abusive relationship may want to leave her partner but feels trapped or afraid. Offer resources such as the number of the National Domestic Violence Hotline or a shelter for battered women. You could save her life by simply providing a telephone number.

18. Show them empathy

Provide encouraging words to someone who is sick or feeling burdened. Let a single mom who's having a hard time caring for her children know that you can imagine what she's going through. It's okay to say “I feel your pain” or “I understand” what you're going through if you're a single mom yourself who knows the struggle.

How to Show Compassion at Work

Pressure from the workplace is a common source of stress for employees and bosses alike. Your compassion can contribute to making the workplace a welcoming environment. Below are ways to make an employee or co-worker's day better.

19. Help relieve new-employee jitters

The first day on the job comes with nervousness, uncertainty, and anxiousness about being among total strangers. Introduce yourself to the new employee and assure them they've joined a supportive team. Give them a walk-through to help them feel at home. Using humor, you can even let them know that the boss is cool and approachable and not as scary as they appear. You'll make your co-worker feel seen, included, and relieved.

20. Offer guidance

New employees, especially, tend to experience challenges performing tasks that involve unfamiliar procedures. As a seasoned employee, you can offer to explain a simpler way to complete the project just as effectively. This will save time and increase your co-worker's productivity. They may even get a favorable performance report from your boss.

21. Lend a helping hand

You understand the pressure related to meeting a tight deadline all too well. Missing it can have consequences, perhaps a trip to your boss's office to explain.

Help relieve the stress your co-worker is feeling by electing to help them complete an assignment on time. Helping will confirm that you were authentic when you assured them earlier on they've joined a supportive work team.

22. Give praise where it's due

Be the type of boss who recognizes the strengths and positive attributes of your employees and celebrates their achievements. Applauding them will make them feel like an asset to the company. Recognizing the contributions of your employees often serves as motivation and can increase productivity. Your employees may feel happier around a boss who knows how to show compassion.

23. Offer to cover their shift

There are times when employees need to call out to deal with personal or family emergencies, such as a sick child. Another way to demonstrate the “I understand you,” “I feel your pain,” and “I want to help you,” principles of compassion is by offering to pick up the slack. I'm sure they'll be grateful and relieved knowing the rest of the team won't feel the workload strain due to their absence.

Final Thoughts on How to Show Compassion

We should all strive to be authentically kind, considerate, respectful, and forgiving… whether it's toward someone in your social circle, a complete stranger, or a less fortunate individual.

You should show compassion to children and adults equally. Offer help when they're going through hard times or do something that can protect them from mistakes or harm.

Once you've learned the skillful art of compassion, you'll see how even a little can make a huge impact on the life of another.  Read this article on 11 Ways to Practice Humility Throughout Your Life for more ways to be the best version of yourself.

Finally, if you want to increase your happiness and life satisfaction, then watch this free video that details the 7-minute habit for planning your day to focus on what's important .

20 Reasons Why Compassion Is So Important in Psychology

Imagine a world without Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King, Jr., St. Francis of Assisi, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, and so many others.

Imagine a world without the countless individuals who risked their own lives to save others during wartime (i.e., the thousands of Holocaust martyrs listed as the Righteous Among Nations). Imagine a world without those who’ve run into burning buildings or executed other heroic feats of rescue during times of trauma. It’s unthinkable.

And what about the concept of compassion in modern everyday life? After all, if this quality has the power to inspire courageous deeds, it must also encourage all sorts of positive behaviors that have both individual and societal benefits.

This article will address these ideas by looking closely at the concept of compassion; such as its meaning, value, psychological and other benefits, and relationship to qualities that promote coping (i.e., resilience).

Empirical research examining the impact and correlates of compassion will also be included. If compassion may be perceived as a requisite for a meaningful existence and civilized society, it is indeed a concept worthy of continued discovery. So, let’s begin our inquiry into this precious quality that is compassion.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Self-Compassion Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will help you increase the compassion and kindness you show yourself and will also give you the tools to help your clients, students, or employees show more compassion to themselves.

This Article Contains

The concept of compassion in psychology, compassion and positive psychology, research and studies, why is compassion important and necessary, the value and power of compassion, 20 proven benefits of compassion, is compassion linked to resilience, does compassion help to deal with stress, why is compassion important in society, other common questions, 12 psychology journals on compassion, a take-home message.

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

The Dalai Lama’s words are instructive because they refer to the emotional benefits of compassion to both the giver and recipient. In other words, the rewards of practicing compassion work both ways.

But what exactly is meant by ‘compassion?’ Various definitions of compassion have been proposed by researchers and philosophers. For example, in his detailed review, Cassell (2009) reported the following three requirements for compassion:

1) “That the troubles that evoke our feelings are serious;”

2) “that the sufferers’ troubles not be self-inflicted— that they be the result of an unjust fate;” and

3) “we must be able to picture ourselves in the same predicament” (p. 3).

As such, compassion is not an automatic response to another’s plight; it is a response that occurs only when the situation is perceived as serious, unjust and relatable. It requires a certain level of awareness, concern and empathy.

Consistent with the above definition, seeing a homeless man on the sidewalk will register differently depending upon how this situation is uniquely perceived by passersby. The amount of compassion elicited by others will be dependent upon how serious his situation is deemed, as well as the perceived degree of fault attributed to him for his predicament.

This example is pertinent to a quote that is prevalent in studies of compassion: “ Make no judgments where you have no compassion ” (Anne McCaffrey, goodreads.com). Judging a person’s predicament in the absence of compassion amounts to little more than judgment. Compassion can be painful to feel because it requires empathy for others, but it is also necessary because it evokes positive action.

A Look at Self-Compassion

Psychologists are also interested in the role of compassion towards oneself. When individuals view their own behaviors and shortcomings without compassion, they may ruminate about their faults and inadequacies in such a way that erodes self-esteem and happiness.

Because of the importance of self-kindness and -forgiveness to mental health, the concept of ‘ self-compassion ’ is occurring more often in the psychological literature.

Self-compassion has been defined as involving “self-kindness versus self-judgment; a sense of common humanity versus isolation, and mindfulness versus overidentification” (Neff, 2003, p. 212). It is a way of recognizing one’s inability to be perfect and to see oneself from a comforting rather than critical perspective (Neff, 2003).

Self-compassion is gaining popularity in psychology because of its reported relationships with reduced feelings of anxiety, depression, and rumination (Neff, Kirkpatrick, & Rude, 2007), as well as increased psychological wellbeing and connections with others (Neff et al., 2007; Zessin, Dickhäuser, & Garbade, 2015).

As research emerges suggesting that self-compassion represents an important protective mechanism, increased numbers of psychological interventions are including self-compassion as a key treatment component.

The field of positive psychology “ is founded on the belief that people want to lead meaningful and fulfilling lives, to cultivate what is best within themselves, and to enhance their experiences of love, work, and play ” (International Positive Psychology Association in Donaldson, Dollwet, & Rao, 2014, p. 2).

It is a field that encompasses an array of positive experiences such as contentment, optimism, and happiness which cover past, present and future timepoints; as well as individual (i.e., forgiveness) and group (i.e., civility) level traits (Kashdan, & Ciarrochi, 2013).

Considering positive psychology’s focus on the promotion of positive emotions, traits, and behaviors that ultimately foster positive wellbeing (Donaldson et al., 2014); the study of compassion fits in well with the interests of positive psychologists. The role of compassion in positive psychology is being increasingly supported by science.

In their comprehensive review of empirical studies within the positive psychology field between 1999 and 2013, Donaldson and colleagues (2014) identified 771 articles across 46 countries addressing the aims of positive psychology.

Wellbeing was the most prevalent topic studied. The researchers reported a number of studies indicating that compassion and gratitude were predictors of increased wellbeing (Donaldson et al., 2014).

Additionally, mindfulness was the most frequently researched intervention, and intensive mindfulness training was related to increases in several positive outcomes, including self-compassion. There is little doubt that compassion will continue to maintain its place in positive psychology as a quality meriting continued attention and research.

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There are a growing number of research studies examining the benefits and correlates of compassion.

The following table provides a list of 14 examples:

Increased compassion is related to increased happiness and decreased depressionShapira & Mongrain, 2010

Since Seligman and Csikszentmihalyi (2000) originally set the groundwork for the positive psychology movement 15 years ago, many exciting research studies have emerged within the field. Included within this research is the aim of increasing the understanding of important predictors of prosocial outcomes, such as compassion.

But why compassion? Seppala, Rossomando and James (2013) describe social connection as an underlying drive of human behavior, even at the physiological level. As we are a highly social species, fostering meaningful relationships is an essential aspect of healthy human adjustment.

Establishing such connections requires the ability to express care and concern for other people, as well as to identify with them. This latter concept has been termed ‘perspective taking’ (Kashdan, & Ciarrochi, 2013) and is an area of importance in relationship-building because being able to identify with another person’s feelings is strongly related to empathy.

Compassion and empathy are fundamental aspects of quality relationships as they enable kind and loving behavior. Compassionate behavior such as volunteer work also has been associated with positive outcomes such as increased academic aspirations and self-esteem among adolescents (Kirkpatrick, Johnson, & Beebe, et al., 1998), as well as improved mortality rates among older volunteers (Yum & Lightfoot, 2005).

Not only does showing compassion for others make us feel better about ourselves, but self-compassion also serves an important function for wellbeing. Unfortunately, people often disparage themselves over mistakes for which they would readily forgive others. Yet, when we look beyond our flaws and treat ourselves with forgiveness and understanding, we increase our psychological health and wellbeing.

In fact, self-compassion has been reported as more beneficial than self-esteem because it strongly enhances emotional resilience without also fostering some of the negative correlates that have been associated with self-esteem (i.e., ego-defensiveness; Neff, 2011).

The reported relationships between both compassion and self-compassion with various positive outcomes represent exciting findings for both researchers and psychologists alike.

According to the Dalai Lama:

Each of us in our own way can try to spread compassion into people’s hearts. Western civilizations these days place great importance on filling the human ‘brain’ with knowledge, but no one seems to care about filling the human ‘heart’ with compassion. This is what the real role of religion is.

(Quotegarden.com).

This quote is pertinent to the field of medicine, wherein medical school training places a strong emphasis on the attainment of knowledge— with minimal attention given to the teaching of compassion.

This lack of attention to compassion in the medical field has been reported by patients, with one survey indicating that only 53% of hospitalized patients reported experiencing compassionate care (Lown, Rosen, & Marttila, 2011).

However, for those experiencing serious or traumatic healthcare issues, bedside manner makes a huge difference in terms of the patient’s emotional and physical health. Moreover, it only takes one uncaring medical professional to discourage future trips to the doctor.

Clearly, the value and power of compassion are essential within the medical field. As patients face their pain, anxiety and fear; nurturing of the soul takes on a vital role in both healing and coping.

For example, in a 17-year longitudinal study of HIV patients, researchers found that greater giving of compassionate love and compassionate love towards oneself were predictive of longer survival (Ironson, Kremer, & Lucette, 2018). This finding is a true testament to the power of compassion.

While the value of compassion in healthcare has gained increased attention among researchers, especially in the field of nursing— it remains a neglected focus of training.

In a poignant story recently posted on Facebook (Treasureside.com), the value of compassion in the nursing field is beautifully articulated. This article chronicles a woman who lost her baby during delivery; it’s a raw and gut-wrenching description of her experience. Despite her despair, the mother used social media to convey her experience as a way of honoring the compassion of nurses.

In her ‘thank you’ letter, she expressed her gratitude to her nurses by noting the many loving and compassionate acts they displayed during her trauma. Here are a few of her expressions of appreciation toward the nurses:

• “ Thank you for being my advocate when I couldn’t speak up because I was too busy fighting for my life. ”
• “ Thank you for holding me as I wept at the burden [breast milk] I could not release. Your embrace did nothing to lighten the heaviness in my breasts, but you brought a glimmer of light into my very dark world. ”
• “ Thank you to the nurse in the ICU who came in to clean me up after my daughter died. Thank you for taking the time to help me wash my face and brush my hair. ”
• “ Thank you to the nurse who dressed my baby and took her picture. Thank you for making sure her hat didn’t cover her eyes and that her hands were positioned gracefully. ” (Treasureside.com).

This beautiful letter says everything about the necessity and power of compassion among nurses, who – especially in situations such as this one— often represent the healthcare professionals who nurture patients through their worst nightmares.

The article portrays, not just one or two compassionate nurses; but a full team of caring individuals who seemed to work together in fully embracing a devastated family’s emotional, psychological, and physical needs. These skills go well beyond medical training; they reflect a depth of understanding and sensitivity that is the epitome of kindness, generosity, and love.

Compassion has been described as the “essence of nursing” (Chambers & Ryder 2009), as it requires the ability to perceive the patient’s experience while promoting healing and alleviating suffering. Training healthcare workers in compassion becomes complex because everyone expresses and receives compassion differently.

In their qualitative study of hospital patients in the United Kingdom, Bramley and Matiti (2014) explored patients’ experiences of compassion during their nursing care.

Patients defined nursing compassion in the following ways:

1) Compassion was reported as strongly connected to care, involving encouragement, plenty of time dedicated to patients, and individualized, personal care;

2) Empathy was also considered important and included the desire for nurses to understand how the lack of compassion might feel to a patient; and

3) While the value of compassion did not waver among patients, they disagreed about whether it represents a teachable quality versus an innate trait.

The authors suggest that clinical practice emphasize the importance of nursing compassion by using compassionate care activities (i.e., hearing patient stories, role-playing compassionate behavior, etc.; Bramley and Matiti, 2014). Therapeutic materials based on Mutzel’s therapeutic relationship model have also been designed to teach student nurses how to be more compassionate and empathetic toward patients (Richardson, Percy, & Hughes, 2015).

Of course, there is no reason for compassion within healthcare to be a requirement only for nurses; doctors also have a responsibility to respond to patients in a way that reduces anxiety and promotes wellness and coping— especially for patients dealing with serious illness.

One study found that physicians significantly reduced anxiety among cancer patients by simply providing a 40-second compassion video to patients (Fogarty, Curbow, & Wingard, et al., 1999). Moreover, among patients who viewed this short video, doctors were rated as higher in caring, compassion, and warmth.

If 40-seconds of compassion can make a meaningful difference in reducing patient anxiety, why not ensure that it is consistently applied during patient-doctor conversations?

We are all familiar with the flight video instructing parents to provide oxygen for themselves before their children. This is because we can only help others if we take care of ourselves first; otherwise we have nothing to offer.

Along these lines, the notion of self-compassion is gaining increased attention in healthcare research. Doctors, nurses and other medical professionals may work long hours doing highly stressful work. Self-compassion is an important way for such healthcare professionals to practice self-care and -kindness in order to prevent burnout.

Compassion fatigue (to be subsequently described) and burnout are significant nursing stressors (Neville & Cole, 2013), with research reporting moderate to high levels of burnout among 82% of ER nurses (Hooper, Craig, Janvrin, Wetsel, & Reimels, 2010).

Visualize, for example, a nurse or physician who works a 12-hour shift in a busy emergency room. There are times when he/she may be exhausted with little time to eat; all the while experiencing the stress and sense of personal responsibility that comes with life or death situations.

By emotionally restructuring cognitions in a way that is consistent with self-compassion (i.e., by understanding that some events are beyond one’s control), the medical professional will be better able to cope with highly stressful situations.

Despite the logical justification for increased self-compassion among healthcare workers (including benefits to patients), there isn’t a great deal of research or medical training emphasis on self-compassion.

Consequently, physicians tend to instead value personal qualities such as perfectionism (Mills & Chapman, 2016), which is an important omission. After all, self-compassion predicts reduced anxiety and increased psychological wellbeing (Neff et al., 2007)— qualities that will only serve to enhance the ability of medical personnel to perform quality work.

Read more about compassion training here .

Even though self-compassion and compassion toward others are still burgeoning areas of research, many proven benefits have already been identified.

Here are 20:

• Compassion promotes social connection among adults and children. Social connection is important to adaptive human functioning, as it is related to increased self-esteem, empathy, wellbeing; and higher interpersonal orientation (Seppala et al., 2013).
• Compassion is related to increased happiness (Shapira & Mongrain, 2010).
• Compassion is related to higher levels of wellbeing (Zessin et al., 2015).
• Compassionate love is associated with higher patient survival rates, even after adjusting for social support and substance use effects (Ironson et al., 2017).
• Patient-reported clinician empathy and compassion is related to increased patient satisfaction and lower distress (Lelorain, Brédart, Dolbeault, & Sultan, 2012).
• Brief expressions of compassion expressed by doctors are related to decreased patient anxiety (Fogarty, et al., 1999).
• Compassion has a mediating effect on the link between religion and aggression among adolescents. Stated another way, a relationship between religion and aggression was diminished among youths rated higher in compassion and self-control (Shepperd, Miller, Tucker, & Smith, 2015).
• Compassion-focused therapy is reported as a promising therapeutic approach for individuals with affective disorders characterized by high self-criticism (Leaviss & Uttley, 2012).
• Compassion promotes positive parenting by improving parent-child relationships (i.e., more affection and less negative affect; Duncan, Coatsworth, & Greenberg, 2009). Consequently, there are various mindfulness-based parent training approaches and parenting books with a specific focus on compassionate parenting  (i.e., Parenting From Your Heart: Sharing the Gifts of Compassion, Connection, and Choice , Kashtan, 2004; and Raising Children Compassionately: Parenting the Nonviolent Communication Way , Rosenberg, 2004).
• Compassion within classrooms is related to increased cooperation and better learning (Hart & Kindle Hodson, 2004).
• Compassion for teachers as expressed by colleagues is linked to increased teacher job satisfaction, organizational commitment, and sense of emotional vigor (Eldor & Shoshani, 2016).
• Compassion expressed as a function of service work is related to improved health and wellbeing among volunteers (Black & Living, 2004; Yum & Lightfoot, 2005).
• Self-compassion has a number of proven psychological benefits, such as reduced PTSD symptom severity (Thompson & Waltz, 2008), and lower levels of psychopathology in general (MacBeth & Gumley, 2012).
• Self-compassion is linked to more positive aging (Phillips & Ferguson, 2013).
• The combination of self-compassion and optimism is beneficial for depression-vulnerable people (Shapira & Mongrain, 2010).
• Self-compassion during smoking cessation training is associated with reduced smoking among participants with low readiness to change, high self-criticism, and vivid imagery during the treatment program (Kelly, Zuroff, Foa, & Gilbert, 2010).
• Low habitual self-compassion and high self-criticism are related to a higher risk of depression (Ehret, Joorman, & Berking, 2014).
• Self-compassion can be linked to various aspects of general wellbeing, such as happiness, optimism, positive affect, wisdom, personal initiative, curiosity and exploration (Neff et al., 2007).
• Self-compassion reduces burnout and fosters important adaptive qualities among medical professionals (Mills & Chapman, 2016).
• Self-compassion buffers the negative impact of stress (Allen & Leary, 2010).

Resilience is defined as “the process of, capacity for, or outcome of successful adaptation despite challenging or threatening circumstances” (Masten, Best, & Garmezy, 1990). It is a type of mental armor that protects individuals from the impact of adversity. Along with promoting wellbeing and social connectedness, there is reason to believe that compassion also fosters resilience.

In their review article, Peters and Calvo (2014) describe compassion as the act of being sensitive to the suffering of others. The authors further note that compassion represents a form of affiliation that motivates us to help those in need. It is in this way that “ compassion triggers positive affect in the face of suffering and therefore contributes to resilience and wellbeing ” (Peters and Calvo, 2014, p. 48).

Resilience has also been proposed as important for reducing the likelihood of ‘compassion fatigue’ – which occurs among workers who deal with high trauma patients (i.e., social workers, hospice nurses, oncologists, rape victim counselors, etc.).

Compassion fatigue has also been referred to as secondary stress that occurs when compassion decreases over time for individuals in roles demanding a high level of compassion. As compassion fatigue is a precursor to burnout, it essential to take steps toward avoiding it.

Interestingly, Mother Theresa was proactive when it came to compassion fatigue , as she required her nuns to restore themselves emotionally by taking leave for a full year every 4-5 years.

Others have suggested that occupational resilience that inhibits compassion fatigue is supported by a work environment with sufficient support for self-care, self-protection, professional development, safety measures, personal experiences, and education (Kapoulitsas & Corcoran, 2014).

These findings suggest that, while compassion plays a role in promoting resilience; there is a line at which a constant need for high levels of compassion can produce burnout. Fortunately, supervisors of those with high stress helping occupations have begun to take some necessary steps toward promoting emotional health and resilience among these invaluable workers.

Several research studies have suggested that there are stress-buffering benefits of compassion. For example, one study by Pace, Tenzin Negi and Adame (2009) investigated the impact of compassion meditation— which consists of meditation that goes beyond soothing the mind by also adding a compassion-enhancement component.

More specifically, following a Tibetan Buddhist mind-training approach, the goal of compassion meditation is to challenge unexamined cognitions toward others in order to promote altruistic feelings (Pace et al., 2009).

Study participants attended twice-weekly 50-minute compassion meditation sessions for a total of six weeks, as well as additional sessions that were completed at home. The researchers found that compassion meditation participation was associated with innate immune responses to psychosocial stress (Pace et al., 2009).

A similar study examined mindfulness-based stress reduction training that consisted of sensory awareness exercises, yoga, loving-kindness meditation; as well as education regarding stress symptoms and consequences (Birnie, Speca, & Carlson, 2010). Research findings indicated that self-compassion was related to reduced stress symptoms (Birnie et al., 2010).

Laboratory studies also have reported stress-related benefits of compassion. For example, in an ego-threat experiment, self-compassion was found to protect participants from anxiety (Neff et al., 2007).

And finally, compassion was assessed among participants who completed a high-stress task. Those who were higher in compassion reported a greater degree of liking for supportive evaluators.

Compassion also interacted with social support such that those participants who were higher in compassion and received social support as part of the experiment showed less physiological stress reactivity as measured by blood pressure, HF-HRV, and cortisol reactivity (Cosley, McCoy, Saslow, & Epel, 2010).

The above studies support the notion that individuals who are high in self-compassion or compassion for others respond to stress in a healthier way than those who are lower in such constructs.

With respect to self-compassion, psychologists argue that self-compassionate individuals buffer themselves from stress by using self-kindness and positive cognitive restructuring as a way of coping with stressful situations (Allen, & Leary, 2010). More research is needed examining the link between compassion and stress, but evidence thus far provides promising support for the stress inoculating power of compassion.

The 14th Dalai Lama, known as Gyalwa Rinpoche, once said,

“ We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves .”

The inner peace this quote illustrates regards the concept of self-compassion. Self-compassion consists of three distinct constructs (Hollis-Walker & Colosimo, 2011):

• showing ourselves warmth and kindness, rather than harsh self-criticism or judgment;
• accepting that imperfection, failure, and suffering are an unavoidable part of the human condition;
• mindfully paying attention to one’s suffering in the present moment with clarity and balance.

Self-compassionate behavior has been linked to increased optimism, emotional intelligence, coping, and several physical health benefits (Neff, 2003). The 12 self-compassion techniques can be implemented to start or develop your journey to self-compassion.

In his classic song “Imagine,” John Lennon envisioned a world in which people lived peacefully without greed or hunger. He was singing about his dream for a compassionate world.

Philosophers have also shared many thoughts on compassion, such as Arthur Schopenhauer (1788-1860), who believed that “ Compassion is the basis of all morality ” (thinkexist.com). In a compassion-based society, historical atrocities such as genocide, war, and acts of terrorism would not have happened.

Fortunately, as history is a window to the future, we can learn a great deal from it. History needs to be considered with a compassionate mindset, which includes an understanding of ongoing historical trauma. And with the hypervigilance to notice and act upon current wrongdoings such that they do not escalate, and negative historical events are not repeated.

More poignantly stated in Deuteronomy 4:9, “ Only guard yourself and guard your soul carefully, lest you forget the things your eyes saw, and lest these things depart your heart all the days of your life. And you shall make them known to your children and to your children’s children ” (Deuteronomy 4:9). This is living with compassion both for the past and the present.

Compassion is suggested as an integral component of evolution by serving to protect vulnerable offspring, promote cooperative behavior between non-family members, and encourage adaptive mate selection (Goetz, Keltner, & Simon-Thomas, 2010). Stated another way, compassion has served to enhance the survival of the human species.

Being moved by the suffering of another has always been necessary for the betterment of society and there is a multitude of modern examples where an ounce of compassion makes a world of difference. Unfortunately, research indicates modern society is showing an alarming decline in social connectedness (Seppala et al., 2013), which is a likely byproduct of the reliance on technology versus face-to-face contact.

Another area in society where increased compassion is sorely needed is driving. Road rage represents a worldwide epidemic that is responsible for millions of injuries per year (James, 2000). If compassionate driving was societally reinforced, as well as a key priority of driving schools, drivers would be less likely to berate other drivers.

Rather, they would be more inclined to understand that drivers are simply human beings who make mistakes. After all, a person who is driving too slowly or fails to signal might simply be having a really bad day. Lives would be saved, injuries avoided, and anger both expressed and modeled for children would be reduced if people would practice compassion behind the wheel.

There are numerous other areas where the suffering of others is too often viewed with an eye of judgment, rather than compassion. For example, homelessness and drug use have reached epidemic proportions in some cities, leaving politicians and citizens at a loss for what to do. There are, however, compassionate approaches that DO work.

In Seattle, WA, the Law Enforcement Assisted Diversion (LEAD) project took a novel approach toward chronic drug-users who habitually cycle through the criminal justice system.

The LEAD philosophy is based on research indicating that continued prosecution and jail time for drug addicts fail to deter recidivism. And most importantly, the revolving door in and out of jail leaves individuals dealing with a large sequelae of serious risk factors and problems (i.e., child and/or domestic abuse, poverty, homelessness, mental illness, lack of family support, racial and cultural disparities, medical problems, lack of educational opportunities, etc.) worse off than before.

By taking both a compassionate and research-based approach, the LEAD program offered repeat offending drug users (the majority of whom were also chronically homeless) the opportunity to avoid arrest and jail time by enrolling in a cooperative effort between Seattle police officers and case managers assigned to participants.

Participants received compassion, rather than judgment; as well as the dignity to make their own treatment-related choices. The program was highly individualized and comprehensive, with each participant receiving extensive case management and supportive services specific to their own needs, and for as long as necessary.

Relative to controls, LEAD participants experienced 60% lower odds of arrest and felony charges (Collins, Lonczak, & Clifasefi, 2017), as well as a significantly greater likelihood of obtaining housing, employment and legitimate income at follow-up (Clifasefi, Lonczak, & Collins, 2016). The LEAD program— which has since been replicated in other states and countries, represents a community of compassion that works.

One of the beautiful aspects of the LEAD program is that the police offers became compassionate adversaries for many individuals who had experienced law enforcement in a very different way for much of their lives.

In their essay on “ Mindfulness, Compassion, and the Police in America ,” DeValve and Adkinson (2008) provide an argument for a new paradigm of organizational mindfulness among police.

The authors propose that police officers “ deepen their practices sufficiently to exude compassion” and institute problem-orienting policing as a way to address “economic inequality, mental illness, individual suffering, and substandard education… [while moving away from] their traditional order-maintenance worldview, and re-empower themselves to act in different (e.g., policy) spheres as well as in areas of public safety ” (DeValve & Adkinson, 2008, pgs. 100 & 102).

In line with the notion of community justice, it is proposed that Buddhist philosophy is an instructive model for law enforcement by applying mindful action toward the reduction of suffering. Not only would a compassionate-based way of policing reduce racial tensions between police and the community, but it also would “ predicate a relationship of trust, a reservoir of goodwill, to help salve the wounds of the community ” (DeValve & Adkinson, 2008, pgs. 103).

Compassion clearly holds an invaluable place in many aspects of society, such as among police officers, medical professionals, teachers, and social workers. Role models of compassion among those in power (i.e., politicians), have the capacity to dampen motivation toward hateful acts; while instead bolstering kindness, love, and understanding. Moreover, by recognizing human fallibility while considering the suffering of others with an eye toward compassion, individuals can make a difference in creating a more peaceful society.

Here is a list of frequently asked questions and answers about compassion.

1. Can compassion be learned?

Absolutely. While some of us behave more consistently compassionate than others due to upbringing and various other factors, interventions promoting compassion indicate that compassion is teachable. Moreover, such interventions have found increases in various positive factors such as social connection.

Naturally, teaching compassion should begin with young children in order to foster a trajectory toward empathy, compassion, and kindness at a time when personalities and beliefs are still developing.

2. Do other animal species have compassion?

Yes, compassion is evident among other animal species, such as monkeys, whales, elephants, and so many more. And of course, dogs and cats have been known to show endless amounts of unconditional love and compassion for humans.

3. What can I do to be more compassionate?

• Be altruistic . We can be more compassionate by moving beyond our comfort zones and helping individuals or engaging in service work as a way of helping people, animals, and our communities. Altruistic behaviors also improve the self-esteem and wellbeing of those who offer them.
• Avoid judgment. It is impossible to know the factors that have led a person toward their current predicament; nor how we would fare in the same situation. Considering our own similarities to others in need will help to promote empathy and compassion.
• Practice gratitude . Reflecting on the things in your life that you appreciate will foster a sense of compassion for those less fortunate.
• Consider Buddhism. The objective of Buddhism is to enhance one’s own wisdom, kindness and compassion; and ultimately to achieve unconditional happiness and enlightenment.
• Be kind to yourself. Sometimes we are our own worst enemies. Remember that all human beings are flawed and will make mistakes; ongoing rumination and self-loathing serves no benefit to you or anyone around you. Instead, practice self-forgiveness and coping tools that will help you to move forward in a more positive way.

4. How can I be a more compassionate parent?

Compassionate parenting is an essential component of positive parenting. Positive parents show compassion by:

• Avoiding labeling children (i.e., “the smart one,” “the athlete,” “the naughty one,” etc.), as doing so is hurtful and promotes both sibling rivalry and self-fulfilling prophecies.
• Be sensitive to your child’s developmental stage.
• Practice regular, open communication.
• Provide affection and emotional warmth.
• Empathize with your child’s feelings.
• Empower autonomy in order to support creativity, empowerment, and self-determination.
• Teach respect for other living creatures by teaching him/her how to care for and show kindness to animals.
• Practice positive discipline, which is warm and democratic, and never violent.
• Guide and teach your child by role modeling kind and compassionate behavior.
• Show optimism and help your child to believe in him/herself and the future.
• Provide unconditional love.

17 Exercises To Foster Self-Acceptance and Compassion

Help your clients develop a kinder, more accepting relationship with themselves using these 17 Self-Compassion Exercises [PDF] that promote self-care and self-compassion.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

Readers interested in finding academic articles focused on compassion might check-out the following psychological journals:

• Current Directions in Psychological Science
• Human Architecture : Journal of the Sociology of Self-Knowledge
• Human Development
• International Journal of Human Caring
• Cognition and Emotion
• Journal of Happiness Studies
• Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
• The Journal of Positive Psychology
• Journal of Research in Personality
• Journal of Traumatic Stress
• Mindfulness
• Motivation and Emotion

Along with psychology journals, medical (especially nursing) and social work journals are also excellent resources for learning about compassion.

Here are 10 examples:

• Ethics and Social Welfare
• The Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine
• Journal of Clinical Nursing
• Journal of Emergency Nursing
• Nursing Inquiry
• Palliative Medicine
• Qualitative Social Work
• Self and Identity
• Social Work
• Stress and Health

The biggest take-home message of this article is that compassion matters. There are numerous proven benefits of both self-compassion and compassion toward others, such as increased happiness, improved medical outcomes, reduced stress, reduced psychopathology, and increased social connectedness.

Compassion plays a vital role in the medical field, as well as those where workers consistently aid the suffering. Among patients, compassion has the power to increase coping and healing; and self-compassion is highly beneficial to healthcare workers. In high compassion-demanding occupations, it is essential that workers be supported such that the likelihood of compassion fatigue (e.g., burn-out) is reduced.

While some people are more compassionate than others, it is a quality that can be learned as evidenced by research interventions that have shown significant increases in compassion and related qualities.

Compassion is an essential element in society and is vital to the survival of the human race. Individuals and groups with power (i.e., police, policymakers, politicians, etc.) have an opportunity to contribute to more healthy, peaceful communities by practicing and promoting compassion. Serious societal problems (i.e., homelessness and recidivism) have been significantly reduced following compassionate, research-based interventions.

There are many ways in which individuals can practice compassion such as by being altruistic, avoiding judgment, being grateful, and by applying positive parenting techniques.

By remembering history— including where compassion was both lacking and in abundance— human beings will be more empowered to make compassionate and meaningful life choices. This is the first step toward creating the loving and peaceful society imagined by so many of us.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Self Compassion Exercises for free .

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What our readers think.

You know articles like this are a dime a dozen and always state the obvious and can actually work with relatively normal people. Compassion can be a good thing and everyone knows it. But sometimes compassion is not a good thing and can even make things worse. For example, one may give a gift out of compassion to someone may misread the intent. And, sometimes when you show compassion by helping someone, and not especially expecting a thank you, it can hurt if the help goes unrecognized. If it happens once its not too bad and you can get over it. But, if the situation continues to happen, it can make you not want to share anymore with some people.

Steve, these are great challenging reflections. Such articles can feel trite, but it’s when we really sit and examine compassion in our inner life and in our relationships, and how it works, that they become meaningful. Your described situations in which compassion leads to ‘bad’ outcomes maybe are situations where people’s expectations are unrealistic that they know best what will be helpful to others or that they are able to control others’ response. Compassion is not the problem in these situations. The trouble is a lack of discernment about what will actually be of help to the other person. Truthfully, we can never know for sure how to help, but it doesn’t mean that compassion is any less valuable as a motivation. In fact, the not knowing may make compassion all the more important. If compassion is strong, we are more likely to keep trying to figure out how to be of help, even when we fail or have our efforts ignored. Maybe we even see that we have helped, and that feels good even though our efforts are ignored by others. That we we are rewarded intrinsically, even if no one notices from the outside. Maybe we realize that the part of us that wants to be thanked is actually self-centered, so we really were not acting entirely out of compassion after all? The intrinsic desire to help is what compassion is referring to, and it need not be impacted by whether or not we are acknowledged for helping or whether we are able to help. The desire is there, and it can be cultivated and sustained, and it can be extended to be more inclusive. over time. This great article explains why this is beneficial to ourselves, not just others! To learn more about compassion experientially, perhaps see The Compassion Shift at Emory University, a training program to make sense of these things on a practical, on-the-ground level.

An exceptionally good article addressing the most urgent need of society today. Compassion to others and self will enable practitioners (anyone including parents) to view their roles and life in a balance way. Compassion to others and self are equally important for the ministers of religions and their team/associates. I personally found this article very useful because I am a parent and I work with people who have autism and severe learning disabilities.

compassion is a valuable human quality for all ( most of all those in the helping professions) As an executive coach and church counselor I am often perplexed as to the dividing line between identifying with the client and /or keeping a professional distance; such that the client has the ownership of the issue and YOU the coach/counselor is the objective observer or solution provider.

Thank you so much for your article on compassion, highlighting it’s importance in today’s COVID-19 context and how sick the world would be without compassionate people around. It is due to lack of compassion that so much of stigma is created around COVID 19. Very true. Compassion promotes personal as well as Society’s well being. Thank you again.

Hi Sr. Mary, Thank you for your kind words. Indeed, the world would do well if we all worked hard to show one another that little bit more compassion in the wake of this crisis. I hope you are keeping safe and well. – Nicole | Community Manager

Your writing on compassion is spot on. Thank you for doing this article. I am sharing it with Compassionate Pomona and Compassionate California so that others can benefit from your research. You are right that what the world needs now is compassion in action everywhere.

Hi Diana, Couldn’t agree more. We’re glad to hear that this post resonated with you, and thank you for sharing it. – Nicole | Community Manager

Is this peer reviwed journal

Its informative article thanks.

Thanks, Heather, for this great overview. Some people fear that self-compassion leads to being too lazy. While being hard on oneself is certainly no good recipe for well-being, it has worked for many to be successful. Or so it seems. Do you know of any scientific research shedding light on this issue?

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How To Show Compassion: Practical Ways To Cultivate Empathy And Understanding

In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to  feel disconnected  from those around us. One vital fact to remember is that  empathy can be cultivated  through  various efforts and practices .

This article will guide you on practical ways to develop  empathy and compassion , enhancing your connections with others. Let’s  make a start  on this  journey together .

Key Takeaways

• Compassion means noticing someone’s struggle and wanting to help. It includes empathy but also involves taking action to ease another’s pain.
• Practising self-compassion  is key for our mental well-being. It helps us be kinder to ourselves during tough times and grows our ability to be compassionate towards others.
• Active listening, volunteering, and donating  are practical ways to show compassion in everyday life. These actions can make a big difference in someone’s day or life.
• Teaching empathy  from a young age is important. By setting an example of compassion, we encourage others, including children, to understand and share the feelings of those around them.
• Avoiding empathy fatigue  by taking care of oneself is crucial for continuing to support others effectively. Balancing self-care with caring for others prevents burnout and fosters sustained compassionate actions.

What is Compassion?

Moving from an introduction to the core of our topic brings us directly to understanding compassion. Compassion means noticing someone’s pain or struggle and  feeling moved to help  them.

It’s not just about feeling sorry for others; it involves an  actual desire to step in and make a difference  in their lives. This emotion arises when we see another suffering, recognising their distress as important, and we feel a genuine urge to assist.

Empathy acts as the foundation of compassion, where we genuinely share in the emotions of those around us. Yet,  compassion takes it a step further by adding a layer of action —wanting to alleviate that suffering.

It embodies empathy in action, showing that understanding another’s pain isn’t enough; acting on this understanding is crucial for truly compassionate care. Through this lens, we see compassion not only as an emotional response but also as a powerful force for change in both ourselves and others’ lives.

The Power of Self-Compassion

Promoting self-compassion is vital for mental well-being and resilience in facing life’s challenges. Embracing self-compassion dispels myths around self-criticism, offering a pathway to nurture kindness towards oneself.

Importance of self-compassion

Self-compassion matters because it’s about honouring and accepting your humanness. Things won’t always go as planned, and how you talk to yourself in these moments lays the groundwork for coping with life’s ups and downs.

Practicing self-compassion means  offering kindness to oneself , instead of engaging in harsh self-criticism over mistakes or failures. This approach allows individuals to navigate difficult situations without judging themselves unfairly.

Having a compassionate attitude towards oneself fosters an environment where personal growth is prioritised over seeking social approval. Research highlights that those who practice self-compassion tend to experience benefits like  increased mindfulness ,  optimism , and a  stronger sense of self-efficacy .

These advantages underline the importance of  being gentle with oneself  amidst suffering, failing or feeling inadequate; reinforcing the idea that everyone deserves compassion from others and from themselves alike.

Common myths about self-compassion

Self-compassion often gets misunderstood. Many believe it’s about self-pity or being selfish, but these views are far from the truth. Here is a detailed look at common myths:

• It’s Just Self-Pity : Some people think showing compassion to oneself means wallowing in one’s sorrows. In reality,  self-compassion  involves  acknowledging one’s feelings  without overidentifying with them. This approach fosters emotional resilience.
• Believed to Be Selfish : A widespread myth is that self-compassion turns individuals inward and away from others. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Practising kindness towards oneself creates a foundation for extending empathy and compassion to others, enhancing social connections.
• Confused with High Self-Esteem : Unlike striving for high self-esteem which can involve comparing ourselves to others, self-compassion focuses on treating oneself kindly no matter the circumstances. It promotes an  intrinsic sense of worth  that is not dependent on external achievements or comparisons.
• Seen as Weakness : Showing kindness and understanding towards oneself might be viewed as a sign of weakness by some. However, it requires strength to face our flaws with gentleness and patience,  fostering inner resilience  and a compassionate attitude towards life’s challenges.
• Mistaken for Indulgence : There’s a misconception that being compassionate towards oneself means giving in to every desire or shirking responsibility. On the contrary, self-compassion encourages us to make healthy choices motivated by care for our well-being rather than punishment or guilt.

How to practise self-compassion

Practising  self-compassion  is vital for our well-being. It helps us navigate tough times with a kinder heart towards ourselves. Here are effective ways to cultivate self-compassion in our daily lives:

• Comfort your body : Pay attention to what your body needs. This could mean doing gentle stretches, eating nourishing food, or getting enough rest. Taking care of your physical needs is a form of self-kindness.
• Write a letter to yourself : Imagine writing to a friend who is going through a hard time. Use the same kind words and understanding tone when addressing yourself in this letter.
• Take a self-compassion break : Whenever you notice you’re being hard on yourself, pause. Close your eyes and place a hand over your heart. Offer yourself comforting words such as “It’s okay,” or “I understand this is hard.”
• Practice mindfulness : Observe your thoughts and feelings without judgement. Recognise when you’re being critical of yourself and gently redirect your focus towards acceptance and love.
• Engage in  positive self-talk : Change negative thoughts into positive affirmations. Instead of telling yourself “I can’t do this,” say “I’ll try my best.”
• Create a safe environment : Surround yourself with people and things that make you feel secure and accepted. A supportive community can greatly enhance your journey towards self-compassion.
• Acknowledge your feelings : Validate what you’re feeling without trying to push it away or judge it as good or bad.
• Set healthy boundaries : Learn to say no to tasks or people that drain your energy or make you feel unworthy.

Cultivating Compassion for Others

Understand empathy and compassion , teach them to others, avoid fatigue, and demonstrate practical ways of showing compassion to those around you. To learn more about how cultivating compassion for others can positively impact your life and the lives of those around you, continue reading.

Understanding empathy and compassion

Empathy means  stepping into someone else’s shoes  to understand their feelings. It’s about imagining yourself in another person’s situation. This ability is crucial because it helps us connect with others on a deep level, making communication more effective and strengthening our relationships.

Being aware of our own emotions plays a big part in developing  empathy  for others, as  self-awareness  allows us to recognise similar feelings in those around us.

Compassion takes empathy further by not only understanding what another person is going through but also wanting to help alleviate their suffering. It involves taking  empathetic action , aiming to improve someone else’s life even in small ways.

Compassionate people often engage in acts like listening attentively, offering support during hard times, or even performing random acts of kindness. These actions foster a positive environment where everyone feels valued and supported, contributing to greater good and meaningful lives for all involved.

Teaching empathy

Children often learn by example, particularly when it comes to  understanding others’ feelings . By  modelling compassion  ourselves, we demonstrate how to recognise and respond to the emotions of those around us.

This is especially important in settings such as classrooms where  embedding empathy into the curriculum  can significantly improve relationships and create a supportive environment for everyone.

Explaining what empathy is and why it matters helps students grasp its value in their lives. It’s crucial that educators use clear language and  practical examples  to teach this concept.

Through activities that encourage students to step into someone else’s shoes, they develop a deeper connection with others, enhancing both personal growth and community well-being.

Avoiding empathy fatigue

After exploring how to teach empathy, it’s vital to address the challenge of avoiding  empathy fatigue . This often happens from caring too much for others, which can drain your  emotional reserves .

Reflecting on the emotional impact of helping others is crucial. It allows you to recognise when your own tank is getting low and take necessary steps before reaching  burnout . Seeking support from those who understand these challenges can be incredibly reassuring and helpful in maintaining a strong capacity for compassion.

Cultivating compassion both for yourself and others plays a significant role in staving off empathy fatigue. Regular practice in awareness connects you deeply with yourself and those around you, fostering a  sustainable approach  towards compassionate living.

This balance helps prevent withdrawal behaviours linked with  empathetic distress . Instead, it promotes actions that are about approaching and helping effectively, keeping the flame of compassion burning bright without letting it consume oneself entirely.

Practical ways to show compassion to others

Avoiding empathy fatigue is crucial to continuing to show compassion. Here are practical ways to step out and uplift others:

• Listen Actively : Pay attention, maintain eye contact, and offer understanding responses.
• Offer Support to Those in Need : Extend a helping hand or a supportive ear when someone is struggling.
• Volunteer : Dedicate your time and effort to causes that support those less fortunate.
• Donate to Charities : Provide financial support to organisations making a positive impact on the lives of others.
• Educate Yourself and Others : Broaden your awareness and share knowledge on social issues affecting communities.
• Be Kind to Strangers : Practise random acts of kindness without any expectations in return.
• Express Gratitude : Show appreciation for the contributions and efforts of others in both big and small ways.

Cultivating Self-Compassion

Taking care of your mental and physical health is essential for cultivating self-compassion. Letting go of negativity and practising self-forgiveness and acceptance are key components in this journey.

Taking care of your mental and physical health

Caring for your mental and physical health is crucial for overall well-being. Engage in  mindfulness activities  to reduce stress, such as meditation or deep breathing exercises. Regular exercise and a balanced diet are essential to maintain physical health and boost mental resilience.

Remember to seek  social support  when needed, as connecting with others can provide comfort during challenging times. Also, prioritise getting  adequate sleep  to rejuvenate both body and mind.

Self-compassion plays a vital role in promoting mental wellness too. Techniques like  positive self-talk  and engaging in hobbies you enjoy can help cultivate  self-compassion  and emotional stability.

Letting go of negativity

Taking care of your mental and physical health is crucial, but equally important is the ability to let go of negativity. Dwelling on negative thoughts can hinder personal growth and relationships.

It’s essential to acknowledge negative emotions without letting them consume you. Embracing self-compassion can help minimise self-doubt, leading to healthier thoughts and interactions with others.

Rather than holding onto negativity,  practising self-forgiveness  and  acceptance allows for genuine connections  and a more authentic way of living.

Practising self-forgiveness and acceptance

When it comes to cultivating self-compassion, practising  self-forgiveness and acceptance  plays a crucial role. By  acknowledging our imperfections and past mistakes , we can offer ourselves the same understanding and forgiveness we extend to others.

This involves embracing self-compassion as a means of  nurturing oneself emotionally, mentally, and spiritually . Letting go of negativity paves the way for self-forgiveness and acceptance, enabling individuals to foster a more compassionate relationship with themselves.

Taking care of your mental health also involves practising self-forgiveness and acceptance. It’s essential for individuals to recognise that they are deserving of forgiveness from both themselves and others in order to promote their overall well-being.

Cultivating Compassion in Everyday Life

Acting compassionately in everyday interactions can greatly impact those around you, making the world a kinder place. To learn about practical ways to integrate compassion into your daily routine, continue reading.

Communicating compassionately

To communicate compassionately, use  active listening  to truly understand others’ emotions and perspectives. Show empathy through  open body language  and  affirming words , making the person feel heard and valued.

Acknowledge their feelings without judgment or interruption, creating a safe space for them to express themselves. Avoid attempting to fix their problems immediately; sometimes people just need someone to listen.

Focus on being present with them in that moment.

The art of compassionate communication lies in understanding others’  emotional needs  and responding with kindness and support. By practicing  open communication , you can provide comfort while nurturing  meaningful connections  with those around you.

It’s crucial to be considerate of how your words impact others as they navigate difficult times or seek help. Engaging in such compassionate conversations can significantly change lives for the better.

Acting compassionately

Acting compassionately involves  demonstrating kindness and understanding  in your daily interactions. Small gestures, such as offering a listening ear or helping someone in need, can make a significant difference.

It’s about acknowledging the struggles of others and  showing empathy through supportive actions . Engaging in acts of compassion not only benefits those around you but also contributes to your own emotional well-being.

Cultivating a compassionate mindset leads to  improved relationships and overall satisfaction  with life. Practising compassion towards others fosters a sense of common humanity, promoting positive social connections.

Developing a compassionate mindset

Cultivating a compassionate mindset involves  practising empathy and understanding  towards oneself and others. This entails  recognising one’s own struggles  and extending kindness to oneself while also empathising with the experiences of those around us.

It is about  fostering an attitude of care , patience, and non-judgment, both towards ourselves and the people we encounter in our daily lives. By developing a compassionate mindset, individuals can create a supportive environment for their emotional well-being and contribute positively to the well-being of others, promoting a more connected and empathetic society overall.

Research-tested compassion practices highlight the efficacy of techniques such as  mindfulness meditation  in cultivating empathy towards oneself and others. These science-based practices have been shown to enhance  emotional regulation ,  reduce stress levels , and  foster deeper connections  with those around us.

15 practical ways of showing compassion

Listen actively. Offer support to those in need. Volunteer and donate to charities.

Educate yourself and others. Be kind to strangers. Express gratitude and encourage others.

Practice patience, share resources, engage in compassionate listening, offer compliments,

help a neighbor, cook a meal for someone, write a thoughtful note.

Listen Actively

Actively listening to someone shows  empathy and understanding . Engage with the speaker by making eye contact, nodding, and using encouraging facial expressions. Provide  verbal cues  like “I hear you” or “I understand your situation” to show that you are genuinely tuning in to their words and emotions.

Avoid distractions and give them your  undivided attention  so they feel valued and heard.

Active listening involves  nonjudgmental attentiveness  to both feelings and facts without interrupting. Show empathy through your body language, tone of voice, and responses to convey  authentic understanding .

Offer Support to Those in Need

Support those in need by  offering a listening ear  and a helping hand. Actively listen to their struggles without judgment and show empathy towards their situation. By demonstrating genuine care and concern, you can provide emotional support that makes them feel understood and valued.

Additionally,  offering practical assistance  such as running errands or providing meals can alleviate some of the burdens they may be facing. Remember that  small acts of kindness  go a long way in showing compassion to those going through difficult times.

Helping others not only provides comfort but also fosters a sense of community and connection.

In addition to offering support to those in need, volunteering is a  powerful way to demonstrate compassion . By giving your time and energy to help others, you can foster better working relationships and create a positive impact within your community.

Whether it’s lending a hand at a local shelter, participating in environmental clean-up efforts, or assisting at charitable events, volunteering provides  tangible opportunities to make a meaningful difference  in the lives of others.

It allows you to actively contribute to causes that align with your values and serves as an  embodiment of empathy and understanding  towards those who may be struggling or in need. Embracing volunteer work not only benefits those receiving assistance but also  brings immense fulfillment and purpose  into one’s own life.

Donate to Charities

After volunteering, another impactful way to show compassion is by  donating to charities . Giving back through  financial contributions  can help support causes that are meaningful to you and have a  positive impact  on the lives of others.

Whether it’s donating to local community initiatives or international aid organisations, your generosity can make a significant difference in addressing various  societal needs .

By contributing to charities, you actively participate in making the world a better place for those in need. Donating also promotes feelings of gratitude within yourself and fosters a sense of fulfilment knowing that you’ve helped improve someone else’s life.

Educate Yourself and Others

Learn about the impact of empathy and compassion through resources such as  The Compassion Project , which offers lessons on  understanding empathy  and its connection to compassion. This educational initiative promotes  emotional intelligence  and  academic success among students .

Incorporating these teachings can help in fostering a more empathetic society. By staying informed about the benefits of practicing compassion, you can actively educate others too, encouraging them to cultivate empathy in their own lives for improved relationships and community well-being.

Be Kind to Strangers

After educating yourself and others, it’s time to extend that compassion to strangers. Small acts of kindness like holding the door open, offering a  genuine smile , or simply saying “thank you” can make a big difference in someone else’s day.

Remember that everyone is fighting their own battles, and your kind gesture could be the highlight of their day. A little  empathy goes a long way  in creating a more compassionate world.

Compassion doesn’t discriminate; it extends its warmth to everyone we meet. So as you go about your day, consider how you can  sprinkle kindness  into the lives of those you encounter – from the person serving your coffee to someone who might just need a  friendly smile .

Express Gratitude

When you’ve shown kindness to strangers,  expressing gratitude  can further amplify the positive impact on those around you. Demonstrating gratitude is a  powerful way to acknowledge  the good in your life and  cultivate empathy  towards others.

Expressing gratitude through  simple acts  such as saying “thank you,” writing thoughtful notes, or offering words of encouragement not only  uplifts others  but also  fosters a deeper sense of connection  and understanding within yourself.

Gratitude expression has been linked to  enhanced positive emotions  and resilience, making it an essential component of cultivating compassion and empathy.

Encourage Others

By  expressing gratitude , you can set an example and inspire others to follow suit. Encouraging compassion in others is a powerful way to foster a more understanding and empathetic community.

In the workplace, when you take the initiative to  show kindness and support , it encourages your colleagues to do the same. By  speaking up for inclusion and equality  in your community, you can motivate others to embrace compassion and generosity as part of their daily lives.

When people see compassion in action, they are more likely to be inspired and join in creating a kinder world.

Practice Patience

Cultivating compassion requires patience , as it takes time to develop a deeper understanding of others’ struggles. It involves  being present and attentive ,  allowing others the space they need  without rushing them through their emotions or experiences.

Patience fosters genuine connections  and  creates a safe environment  for people to open up without feeling pressured or judged.

Practising patience also extends to oneself, as  developing self-compassion is an ongoing journey  that demands understanding and tolerance toward personal setbacks and obstacles. Embracing patience allows individuals to gradually build resilience and empathy for themselves, acknowledging that growth occurs gradually rather than overnight.

Share Resources

Encouraging others to  share helpful resources  and information can be a powerful way to show compassion. Whether it’s  sharing knowledge, skills, or practical tools , providing resources can make a meaningful difference in someone’s life.

It could be as simple as  recommending a good book for self-improvement  or  sharing useful tips for managing stress . By offering valuable resources, we contribute to  creating a supportive community  where everyone has  access to the help they need .

Moving on to practical ways of showing compassion in our daily lives..

Engage in Compassionate Listening

Compassionate listening  is vital for showing empathy and understanding. It involves fully focusing on the speaker, acknowledging their emotions, and refraining from judgement. By  actively listening  without interruption, you can cultivate empathy and create a safe space for others to express themselves.

This practice builds trust and strengthens relationships, fostering a sense of connection and support.

Utilise your  active listening skills  to truly understand others’ feelings. Show genuine interest in what they have to say and  demonstrate empathy  through your attentive presence. Avoid distractions, maintain eye contact, nod in acknowledgement, and provide  validating responses  to show that you genuinely care about their experiences.

Offer Compliments

When practising compassionate listening, it’s crucial to follow up with thoughtful actions, such as  offering compliments . A  sincere compliment  can brighten someone’s day and make them feel valued and appreciated.

Whether it’s acknowledging a colleague for their hard work or praising a friend for their kindness,  words of affirmation  have the power to uplift others and foster a more compassionate environment.

Expressing genuine admiration through compliments can have a profound impact on someone’s  emotional well-being . It shows that you are actively recognising and celebrating positive qualities in others, creating  meaningful connections  and spreading positivity.

Help a Neighbor

Offer a  helping hand  to neighbours in need by assisting with  daily tasks or errands , such as grocery shopping or yard work. Taking the time to check in and show that you care can make a significant difference in their day and foster a  sense of community .

Engaging with kindness and support towards your neighbours can create a  positive impact  on both their lives and your own.

– Cultivating Compassion in Everyday Life

Cook a Meal for Someone

Cooking a meal for someone is a  heartfelt gesture  that can convey care and support. It’s an opportunity to offer  tangible assistance  and nourishment during challenging times. Whether it’s preparing a  comforting dish  for a friend going through tough circumstances or surprising a busy loved one with a  home-cooked meal , the act of cooking for someone can show compassion in action.

By taking the time to create something with your hands and sharing it with others, you’re providing not just sustenance but also  warmth and thoughtfulness .

When you cook for someone, you’re offering more than just food; you’re extending  kindness and consideration  as well. This simple act can make a significant impact on their day, making them feel cherished and supported in an unspoken way.

Write a Thoughtful Note

Express your compassion by writing a  heartfelt note  to someone in need. Sharing kind words can provide comfort and support during difficult times. Letting others know that you are thinking of them can make a meaningful difference in their lives.

It’s a simple yet powerful way to  show empathy  and kindness.

Taking the time to write a thoughtful note demonstrates  genuine care  and consideration for others’ well-being. Your words have the potential to uplift spirits, offer solace, and remind someone that they are not alone.

Embracing this practice contributes to creating a more compassionate community where support and understanding are valued.

In conclusion, by incorporating simple and  practical acts of compassion  into our daily lives, we can  nurture empathy and understanding . These actions include  active listening ,  offering support  to those in need, volunteering, and  expressing gratitude .

Cultivating empathy is vital for fostering stronger connections and creating a more empathetic society. Let’s strive to show compassion through our words and actions every day.

1. What does it mean to show compassion?

Showing compassion means trying to understand what others are going through and offering help or kind words to make them feel better. It’s about putting yourself in their shoes, especially when they’re experiencing something difficult.

2. How can I practice compassion every day?

You can practice compassion by asking questions and really listening to the answers, even if you don’t agree with them. Try bringing to mind people in your life who might be going through hard times and thinking of ways you could help or support them.

3. Is it important to show empathy towards someone who is suffering?

Yes, showing empathy is a crucial part of being compassionate. It involves saying things like “I understand” or “I know what’s going on,” because sometimes people just want someone they love to acknowledge their feelings without immediately trying to fix the problem.

4. Can doing something as simple as eating well affect how compassionate I am?

Interestingly, looking after your own health, including eating well and stress relief practices like meditation, can improve your ability to offer compassion because it puts you in a better state of mind for understanding others’ needs.

5. Does effective communication only include talking?

Effective communication isn’t just about speaking; nonverbal cues play an essential role too. Sometimes just being present and offering a caring gesture can communicate more than words ever could when someone feels that they need help.

6. Why is taking notes important when trying to be more compassionate?

Taking notes might not seem directly related at first but jotting down thoughts on how you’ve been able or unable to connect with someone meaningfully ensures constant improvement in how we offer our empathy and understanding toward others daily.

MindOwl Founder – My own struggles in life have led me to this path of understanding the human condition. I graduated with a bachelor’s degree in philosophy before completing a master’s degree in psychology at Regent’s University London.  I then completed a postgraduate diploma in philosophical counselling before being trained in ACT (Acceptance and commitment therapy). I’ve spent the last eight years studying the encounter of meditative practices with modern psychology.

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Let's build a compassionate world together!

“There is no small act of kindness. Every compassionate act makes large the world.” – Mary Anne Radmacher

I’ve been thinking about compassion a lot lately. I think it is one quality that sums up a lot of what gives direction in my life, what motivates my choices and actions. Compassion.

I’ve often been advised to not go so deep into things when I talk about animal welfare, issues with fast fashion, or reducing the amount of waste we throw away mindlessly.

To others, it seems that these problems are so omnipresent and deeply rooted that no action can ever have any impact and it’s a waste to make myself suffer for them. I am asked to take it easy and not trouble my life.

But, all of this hails from compassion. If I can’t solve a problem fully, I can still solve some of it. Why think in an all-or-nothing framework? Each act counts. Each sacrifice counts. Each life counts. Each act of compassion counts.

What is compassion?

The definition of compassion, according to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary , is the "sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it."

So, compassion is not only about observing suffering, it is also about wanting to reduce or end it. And, I think that’s powerful. It’s a quality that must exist in each human being on this planet.

Compassion vs Empathy

Compassion is a great friend of empathy which is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. I will not pit these two against each other and tell you which is better, because we need both.

We need compassion and we need empathy to change the nature of the world, to change the lives of human beings and animals, to change ourselves, and restore the health of the natural world.

I see that I’m talking quite passionately about compassion, but that’s how much I believe in it. To not only look and feel someone’s suffering, but also take action to heal it is a true act of growth, not only for yourself but for the state of the world.

Each time someone shows compassion, we save the world. We might not save all of it, but that shouldn’t be our concern. Our concern must only be doing all that is in our power, the rest will take care of itself.

Alright then, now that we’ve talked about compassion, let’s talk about how to show it, to others and yourself.

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” – Dalai Lama

How to show compassion to others

1. grow your awareness.

Before we show compassion, we must be aware of someone’s pain and suffering. So, the first step is to open our eyes to see others and how they are, and what they’re going through.

This applies not only to the people you know, but to people around the world, animals, and the environment. Once we feel compassion, we then ask ourselves what they need and what is possible for us to do.

So, let’s not live n bubbles anymore, aware of only our problems, but let’s open up our hearts to suffer together so that we can all heal together.

2. Understand their side of the story

A very important part of compassion that helps in eliminating judgment and helps us take the right steps is to understand what someone is going through.

What is the state of their life? What might not be meeting the eye? How do they feel?

When you see someone who’s not having an easy time, take the initiative to let them know that you want to listen to them only with the intent of understanding them.

People need others to understand them more than they need them to do something about their situation.

3. Control your negative reactions

An act of compassion that must be everpresent in our communication is to learn how we respond especially when we’re experiencing negative emotions like jealousy, anger, fear, guilt, and contempt.

It often happens that in the midst of these emotions we end up lashing out or saying what we don’t really mean to. In these times, take a step back, take a deep breath, and be alone for some time to come back to a better state.

4. Appreciate them

All of us make progress in our lives in unique shapes, forms, and speeds. Most of us would say that we’re doing the best that we can. But, do most of us feel appreciated for it?

Now, I don’t mean this in an entitled, arrogant way. But, think about the mother who goes above and beyond to provide for her children.

Think about the eldest daughter who’s constantly trying to prove that she’s worthy enough to live up to expectations. Think about the husband who’s trying to be the best for his spouse, day in and day out.

Do you know anyone like this? Can you think of people in your life that you can appreciate? This small act of compassion would take a minute of your time and might turn out to be exactly what this person was waiting for for a long time.

5. Ask them what they need

A very simple and direct way to show compassion to someone is to ask them what they need. Sometimes people want to tell what they want to receive and giving them the chance to express that shows respect and care.

Of course, we must proactively help people but when it seems that what they want isn’t something you have figured out yet, communicate that with them.

Let them know that you want to be there for them and that you need them to tell you how you can do that without causing them any more trouble.

6. Choose your words wisely

This should be needless to say, but I’ve seen far too many bad examples so let me make it a point. When someone is going through a rough time, be very careful with the words that you speak.

Don’t try to pretend that you already know why they feel so, or what is going to help them. Don’t invalidate their suffering or offer ridiculous advice like, “Just choose to be happy” or “Stop thinking about this”.

Also, don’t use humor unless you really know it will make them feel better. It can go down in quite an insensitive way too.

The best way is to listen without judging, validate their feelings, let them know that you’re there for them, and offer the appropriate help in that situation.

7. Support them

People have dreams. People have ideas. People have choices.

Although we may not agree with each other the whole time, we must know that each person is independent and deserves to experiment, learn, and shape a life with their own lessons.

So, when someone is vulnerable with you about what they’re thinking of doing, and you think it’s not a great idea, don’t shove it down.

Yes, tell them what you think about it, but in a kind way, sharing that you’d support them whichever choice they make.

This applies not only to big ideas but little things too. Support someone when they try a new recipe, start a workout challenge, try new makeup, cut their hair, or do other things.

To be the kind of person who celebrates others’ lives is a beautiful feat.

How to show compassion to yourself

1. take care of your health.

The very step in showing compassion to yourself is to take care of your health, in little and big ways.

We tend to get so busy with work or family that our health goes to the backburner. But, it’s the important thing in life. It is what supports life.

So, drink water regularly, take breaks, stretch, breath deeply, give time to yourself, eat healthily, meet your friends, stay close to your hobbies, and take care of your health.

2. Treat yourself like a human being

What is with all these extreme expectations? What is with our guilt related to rest? Why do we feel so guilty about failing sometimes?

Let’s remember that no matter how much we read and how wiser we grow, we’re still human beings.

We will need to rest, we will not always make the right decisions, we cannot function at our highest all the time, and we want to feel loved. Let’s live simply .

3. Let go of what isn’t good for you

Be it bad habits, or resentment for someone in your past, be it a stressful, unhealthy job, or comparing to other people, let go of what harms your peace.

In the long run, people often regret wasting time on what never really mattered. So, what do you need to let go of?

Recognize what you’re going through and take steps to help you overcome it.

4. Adopt healthy practices

Things like gratitude journaling , positive affirmations , meditation, therapy, morning walks, work-life balance, distancing from social media, volunteering, being in nature, reading uplifting content, and more, really do have a positive impact on us.

What interests you? Maybe you already tried something, felt good, but didn’t stick with it. But, you deserve to feel peaceful and healthy.

Try these practices and build a healthy routine around them. It doesn’t have to be fancy or too heavy.

Even if it’s just about deep breathing and writing what you’re grateful for regularly, it’s a great step forward.

5. Grow and forgive yourself

A lot of us carry the weight of the past. Maybe we don’t like what we did before, maybe something didn’t work out how we wanted it to, maybe we didn’t listen to the right people, or something else.

But, now we’ve grown, we’ve learned, and we’re doing better. So, it’s time to forgive ourselves .

And even for small things, we resent ourselves so much. Maybe we had a little awkward conversation, maybe someone saw us stumble on a stone, maybe we asked someone for help.

No one in this world does everything perfectly. We all learn from mistakes, experiences, and other people. Let’s embrace that.

6. Talk to yourself kindly

What are the words that you choose for yourself? Are you kind, understanding, and human, or are you harsh and critical?

What you say to yourself matters because it is the foundation of your relationship with yourself .

To show compassion to yourself, talk to yourself kindly.

Here are some positive affirmations (positive statements in response to yourself, your actions, or a situation) that can help you move toward a compassionate way of talking to yourself:

• I love myself just as I am today.
• I choose to be kind to myself.
• I am my own best friend.
• It is natural for me to love myself.
• I am grateful to be the person I am.
• I love each part of myself.
• I honor my life.
• I appreciate all the ways that I am unique.
• I accept my awesomeness.
• I love who I am.
• I am calm and relaxed in all situations.

7. Love and accept yourself

Self-acceptance is embracing yourself just as you are. There are no conditions attached. You accept yourself fully. It’s really important to bring in our lives because we are choosing to live.

And, in every moment of life, we are with ourselves. Imagine if you had to be with someone every single second, a person that you don’t accept, let alone love, it wouldn’t be so pleasant, right?

Now imagine not accepting yourself . If self-acceptance isn’t there, the quality of our life diminishes.

So, make the choice of loving and accepting yourself every day, in every moment. You deserve it, and you will become a better person because of it.

And, that's it! This is what compassion is about, and how we can show it to others and ourselves.

If you found this helpful, share it with your friends and family. I wish you the very best!

💗 Continue Reading: 7 Ways to Be a Good Friend to Yourself From Today

Aarushi Tewari

The writer and affirmations speaker at Gratitude, Aarushi believes that one of the most effective ways of feeling inner peace is by being grateful and having a loving self-relationship.

Free Weekly Gratitude Worksheet!

Discover more from gratitude blog.

Kindness and Compassion for Students

What are they.

Compassion is defined as the feeling that arises when you perceive another’s suffering and feel motivated to relieve that suffering.

Compassion can arise from empathy —the more general ability to understand and feel others’ emotions—but goes further by also including the desire to help. Of course, we can feel compassion without acting on it, and not all helpful acts are motivated by compassion.

When compassion does lead to action, we often call the result kindness. Kindness always includes the intention to benefit other people, especially (though not always) at a cost or risk to ourselves.

Research has shown that compassion and kindness are deeply rooted in human nature–our first impulse is to cooperate rather than compete. Even toddlers spontaneously help people in need out of genuine concern for their welfare. This innate kindness, however, often gets lost in a society built on competition. Schools have a golden opportunity to cultivate the compassionate side of students by creating a school culture in which kindness is valued and practiced.

• A science teacher sets up his classroom to cultivate students’ innate kindness and cooperation, rather than their selfish and competitive natures. He takes the time at the start of the school year to get to know students and for students to get to know each other by doing some fun icebreakers from Playworks, like Crooked Circle .
• To create an inclusive and connected classroom climate, students sit in a large circle for discussions and in small groups during regular instruction.
• Everyone is encouraged to practice self-care, taking short breaks when they need to in the “Chillax Corner”, and to take care of each other—noticing when a fellow student might be having a hard time and connecting with him or her.
• The curriculum is taught with a “prosocial” lens, taking into consideration how the scientific content might be used to benefit students’ communities and society in general.

Children’s understanding of kindness and compassion change as they mature. For example, their ability to be compassionate grows as they develop their perspective-taking ability and emotion regulation. Elementary age students and younger may view kindness mainly in concrete ways, such as in terms of the consequences of actions; whereas, older children and teens can appreciate the intentions behind the actions, allowing them to better navigate complex situations.

• A first grader might say kindness is asking someone to play, taking turns, or helping someone who is hurt.
• A high schooler gives his friend a hard time for choosing to go to the movies rather than study for an important test. At first, his friend is upset, but then realizes that the admonishment was made in his best interest.

Why Are They Important?

Research has found that practicing compassion and kindness can improve health, well-being, and relationships, as well as academic achievement. Of course, beyond our own lives, these qualities strengthen our communities and may even be vital to the survival of our species as a whole.

Kindness and compassion make us happier.

• Compassion training programs, even very brief ones, strengthen reward circuits in the brain and lead to lasting increases in self-reported happiness.
• Compassion training also enables us be more altruistic , and kindness does seem to be its own reward —giving to others activates those pleasure circuits and actually makes people, including kids , happier than spending money on themselves.

Compassion makes us more resilient.

• Feeling compassion helps us to overcome empathic distress —or the feeling for others that makes us so upset that we want to run away rather than help. We are better able to handle the strong emotions that occur when faced with others’ suffering.

Kindness and compassion are good for our health.

• Feeling compassionate can reduce the risk of heart disease by helping slow the heart rate , and compassion training has been shown to reduce stress hormones and boost the immune system.
• Acts of kindness such as donating money help lower blood pressure .
• People who volunteer are healthier overall, and teens who volunteer to help younger kids show reduced risk factors for cardiovascular disease.

Kindness and compassion improve our relationships.

• Compassion is associated with more satisfaction and growth in friendships and makes us less vindictive towards others.
• Compassionate behavior is highly valued in romantic relationships: In surveys of over 10,000 people across 37 cultures, kindness was rated the most important quality in a mate, and the only one universally required.
• Altruism promotes social connections in general and creates ripple effects of generosity in communities.

Kindness and compassion benefit education.

• Preschoolers and elementary schoolers prompted to perform acts of kindness show increased well-being and social competence; in turn, prosocial (kind and helpful) peer interactions increase middle schoolers’ positive emotions and life satisfaction.
• Prosocial behavior in elementary school predicts higher academic achievement in middle school, and it predicts academic achievement in high school.
• High-quality service learning programs, which put compassion into action by combining classroom learning with real-world community service, have been shown to improve academic performance, student attitudes and behavior, and school climate.
• When high schoolers see their school as a kind place, they are more interested and motivated to learn .

Practice Collections

Seeds of Self-Compassion

Art on Purpose

Assessing Your School Climate

Courage Blooms

Inspiring Climate Awareness Through Gratitude

Courage Creatures

Identifying Acts of Courage

Courageous and Compassionate Citizens

Developing the Courage to Speak Up

The Bystander’s Dilemma: What Does Courage Look Like?

Finding Awe in Collective Acts of Kindness

Creating Musical Playlists for the Classroom

The Beauty of Collective Effervescence

Finding Awe In Everyday Moral Beauty

Letting Music Shape You

People Can Change: Recognizing Our Potential for Growth

Listening with Compassion

Building Collaborative Classroom Norms

GGIE Online Courses for Educators

Do you want to dive deeper into the science behind our GGIE practices? Enroll in one of our online courses for educators!

Home / Essay Samples / Life / Compassion / Practicing Compassion: Its Role in Everyday Life – Personal Reflection

Practicing Compassion: Its Role in Everyday Life - Personal Reflection

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• Topic: Compassion , Feeling , Personal Experience

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