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7 Narrative Therapy Worksheets (+ A complete guide)

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This page presents narrative therapy worksheets.

These narrative therapy worksheets aim to help individuals identify their values and resolve their issues while considering those values.

Some of these narrative therapy worksheets are created by us while some of them have been curated from reputable third-party websites after reviewing relevant content in bulk. 

Narrative Therapy Worksheet- Identifying Values 

Narrative therapy is a kind of psychotherapy in which individuals identify their skills and abilities to help them resolve their conflicts.

It enables individuals to solve their problems by themselves, using their own abilities. Narrative therapy aid individuals in finding out their values and exploring skills that are associated with those values.

This helps individuals to apply knowledge of their abilities to live these values to enable them to confront their present and future issues.  

In addition to helping people recognize their inner voice, narrative therapy allows individuals to use their values for their good.

It enables them to acquire these values to become experts in their lives and live their life according to their goals and values.

When individuals are able to listen to their inner voice, they can efficiently recognize their values and work on achieving them.

This makes their life worth living. 

Narrative Therapy Worksheet – Writing My Life Story

Narrative therapy is a non-blaming, interactive and playful approach.

This kind of psychotherapy is helpful for clients who feel their counselors are unable to recognize their needs and help them deal with their issues.

Narrative therapy is helpful for children as well. It is helpful for individuals who are facing difficulties in their lives.

Narrative therapy can aid people with psychological disturbances such as depression or bipolar disorder. 

Empirical evidence has shown that narrative therapy has significant impacts on the mental well-being and distress level of an individual.

In addition to it, the effects of narrative therapy are durable.  

Narrative therapy aims to disclose the hidden aspects of an individual’s past in the form of life narrative, aid individuals in learning emotion regulation and help them construct new meaning with respect to the stories that may emerge in the therapy. 

Narrative Therapy Worksheet- Resolving Conflicts

Narrative therapy is a kind of psychotherapy in which individuals are enabled to identify their values and skills related to those values.

Identifying values gives individuals a direction to move whereas the abilities associated with those values help individuals deal with their present and future issues. 

Narrative therapists are found to be similar to solution-focused peers on the basis of their similar assumption that people are resourceful and have strengths.

The people do not see people as having conflicts but they see issues as being imposed on people by the nonbeneficial or detrimental societal cultural practices. 

Narrative Therapy Worksheet- My Life Story-A Narrative Exercise

My life story- a narrative exercise, is a great worksheet to help an individual write his life story, mentioning all the important events of his life.

This worksheet aims to help an individual review his life events closely and work on them to prevent the effects of past events on his present and future.

It enables an individual to create emotional distance fro his past so he can become more reflective to understand the true meaning of his life, his values, goals, and ambitions.

The worksheets aid an individual to organize his events by writing his events and develop self-compassion without indulging too deep into his memories. 

The worksheet allows an individual to write his life story very briefly, mentioning only the important events of his life.

Then the individual is directed to write something about his future and the important events he wants to ad hin this story. 

This is a very simple yet effective worksheet.

You can download it in the form of pdf from here . 

Narrative Therapy Worksheet- Life Story

Focusing on the past events of life and determining the effects of those events on the present life of an individual can help him understand the intensity of those events and help him get rid of those memories to improve his present and the future. 

The worksheet, life story, by therapistaid.com, is based on narrative therapy.

This worksheet allows the individual to write his life story in three different parts; the past, the present, and the future.

This enables an individual to pay attention to the important events of all three phases of his life and helps him find his true meaning of life, his goals, aims, and values.

It also enables the individual to identify their personal strengths in each of the three sections. 

This worksheet aims to aid individuals to find their meaning of life, work on them by recognizing their strengths and develop a sense of fulfillment that leads to happiness and contentment.  

This worksheet can be accessed from here . 

Narrative Therapy Worksheet- Narrative Therapy Exercises

Narrative therapy exercises consist of ten effective exercises based on narrative therapy, that can help an individual find the true meaning of their lives and work on them.

The first exercise directs the individual to write about the struggling event of his life for four consecutive days.

This exercise enables the individual to identify the small edits in his writings that can have a lasting effect on his life.

The second exercise directs an individual to write about a painful event of his life once but as a 3rd person. This exercise leaves positive impacts on the individual’s life.

Tye third exercises aim to enable the individual to focus on why a certain painful or distressing event occurred in his life.

The fifth exercise increases awareness about oneself and allows the individual to identify his ideal future.

The sixth exercise allows the individual to write a letter about his unresolved or conflictual relationships but with the opposite hand.

The seventh exercise allows the individual to write a letter about the chapter of his life to a close partner.

The eighth exercise directs an individual to write a letter about his life events, past, present, and future to himself.

Ninth exercises aim to increase self-awareness of the individual and enable him to analyze himself.

The last exercise directs the individual to narrate his story to a close partner while considering specific experiences.

This worksheet is easily accessible on the internet. You can download it from here . 

Narrative Therapy Worksheet- Problem Solving CYP

Problem-solving CYP worksheet is a great resource for allowing the individual to resolve their conflicts.

This brief, simple but effective worksheet that enables individuals to find out solutions for their problems skillfully.

The worksheet enables individuals to identify their problem and directs them to think of at least three solutions to the problem.

Then it allows the individual to focus on the advantages and disadvantages of using each solution for resolving the conflict.

Next, the individuals are asked to select the best solution ad use it to resolve their conflicts.

This worksheet enhances the problem-solving abilities of an individual and enables him to view one thing from more than one perspective.

It also improves his analyzing skills.

This worksheet can be accessed on the internet easily.

You can download this worksheet for this page. 

This page provides you with some of the best and most effective narrative therapy worksheets that are helpful for you in identifying your values, strengths and enhancing your problem-solving abilities.

Some of these worksheets were created by us while some of them were curated from reputable third-party websites.

If you have any questions or queries regarding these worksheets, let us know through your comments.

We will be glad to assist you. 

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Narrative Therapy: Definition, Techniques & Interventions

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Olivia Guy-Evans is a writer and associate editor for Simply Psychology. She has previously worked in healthcare and educational sectors.

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BSc (Hons) Psychology, MRes, PhD, University of Manchester

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On This Page:

Narrative therapy, is a powerful psychotherapeutic approach that empowers clients to explore and reshape their life stories, particularly those overwhelmed by challenges and emotional distress.

During sessions, clients engage in open dialogues with their therapists, delving into their narratives and actively challenging the ones that contribute to their struggles.

By separating problems from personal identity, narrative therapy emphasizes the belief that individuals are the ultimate authorities in their own lives.

Through this collaborative process, clients gain a deep understanding of their values and skills, enabling them to effectively confront present and future issues and pave the way for transformative change.

When was narrative therapy developed?

Narrative therapy was developed in the 1980s by therapists Michael White and David Epston. It is still a relatively novel approach to therapy that seeks to have an empowering effect and offer therapy that is non-blaming and non-pathological in nature.

What is a narrative?

A narrative is a story. As humans, we have many stories about ourselves, others, our abilities, our self-esteem , and our work, among many others.

How we have developed these stories is determined by how we have linked certain events together in a sequence and by the meaning attributed to them.

We like to interpret daily experiences in life, seeking to make them meaningful. The stories we have about our lives are created through linking certain events together in a particular sequence across a period of time and finding ways of making sense of them – this meaning forms the plot of the story.

As more and more events are selected and gathered into the dominant plot, the story gains richness and thickness.

The idea is that identity is formed by an individual’s life narrative, and several narratives are at work at once. The interpretation of a narrative can influence thinking, feelings, and behavior.

Many narratives are useful and healthy, whereas others can result in mental distress. Mental health symptoms can come about when there is an unhealthy or negative narrative or if there is a misunderstanding or misinterpretation of a narrative.

What is the aim of narrative therapy?

Narrative therapy seeks to change a problematic narrative into a more productive or healthier one.  This is often done by assigning the person the role of narrator in their own story.

Narrative therapy helps to separate the person from the problem and empowers the person to rely on their own skills to minimize problems that exist in their lives.

This therapy aims to teach the person to view alternative stories and address their issues in a more productive way.

Narrative therapy can be used with individuals but can also prove useful for couples or families.

Narrative therapists are also not interested in diagnosing individuals – there is no use of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) during any point of the therapy.

What is the role of the therapist?

The role of the narrative therapist is to search for an alternative way of understanding a client’s narrative or an alternative way to describe it.

The belief is that telling a story is a form of action toward change. Therefore, the therapist will help clients to objectify their problems, frame these problems within a larger sociocultural context, and teach the person how to make room for other stories.

During therapy, the therapist acts as a non-directive collaborator. They treat the client as the expert on their own problems and do not impose judgments.

Instead, the therapist is purely curious and investigative. They are not particularly interested in the cause of a problem but are open to a client’s perception of the cause.

Narrative Therapy Techniques

Putting together the narrative

The therapists help their clients to put together their narratives. This will usually involve listening to the client explain their stories and any issues that they want to bring up.

This allows the person to express their thoughts and explore events in their lives and the meanings they have placed on these experiences.

The therapist may find what is known as a ‘problem-saturated narrative’ comes up, which will be what is causing the client the most distress.

As the story comes together, the client becomes an observer of their story and can then review this with the therapist.

When the therapist communicates to the client during this stage, they will make sure to utilize the client’s use of language since the client is treated as the expert in their narrative.

Externalizing the problem

Once the story is put together, the idea is that it allows the client to observe themselves. The therapist encourages the client to create distance between the individual and their problems, called externalization.

The externalization techniques lead clients towards viewing their problems or behaviors as external instead of an unchangeable part of themselves.

The therapist may ask the client to give a name to the problem so it is seen as a separate entity, such as ‘anger’ or ‘worry.’ The client will then be encouraged to use the given name of the problem when talking about it. Likewise, the therapist will ask questions referring to the problem by the given name.

The distance given to the problem allows people to focus on changing unwanted behaviors.

As people practice externalization, they will see that they can change. The general idea is that it is easier to change a behavior that they do than to change a core personality characteristic.

They will realize that they themselves are not the problem; instead, the problem is the problem.

Deconstruction

Often, when a client has a problematic story, especially when it has been prevalent for a long time, the problem can feel overwhelming, confusing, or unsolvable.

Because of these feelings, people can use overgeneralized statements which can make the problematic stories worse.

The narrative therapist would work with the individual to break down or deconstruct their stories into smaller, more manageable parts to clarify the problem.

Deconstructing makes the problems more specific and reduces overgeneralizing; it also clarifies what the core issue or issues may be. Through deconstructing, the whole picture becomes easier to understand.

The therapist and client may also seek to deconstruct identity and have an awareness of larger societal issues, e.g., sociocultural and political effects which may be acting on the client.

They may find that the context of gender, class, race, culture, and sexual identity also play a part in the interpretations and meanings given to events.

Unique outcomes

When someone’s problematic stories are well established, people can become stuck in them, unable to view alternative versions of the story. A narrative therapist will help people challenge their stories and encourage them to consider alternative stories.

Unique outcomes refer to the exceptions to the dominant story. It may also be known as ‘re-authoring’ or ‘re-storying,’ as clients go through their experiences to find alterations to their story or make a whole new one.

There are hundreds of different stories since everyone interprets experiences differently and finds their own meaning from them. The therapist will help the client to build upon an alternative or preferred story.

These unique outcomes contrast a problem, reflect a person’s true nature, and allow someone to rewrite their story.

Building upon stories from another perspective can help to overcome problems and build the confidence the person needs to heal from them.

Benefits of narrative therapy

Empowers the individual.

As this therapy stresses that people do not label themselves negatively (e.g., as the problem), this can help them feel less powerless in distressing situations.

They find that they have more control over the stories they have in their lives and how they approach difficult events.

Narrative therapy treats individuals with respect and supports the bravery it has taken for them to choose to work through their personal challenges.

Non-confrontational

This is a non-judgmental approach to therapy, meaning that the clients are not blamed for anything described in their stories.

Likewise, the clients are encouraged not to blame others or themselves. The focus is instead placed on noticing and changing unhelpful stories about themselves and others.

The client is treated as an expert

Narrative therapy does not aim to change a person; rather, it allows them to become an expert in their own lives.

The therapist holds that the clients know themselves well and work as collaborative partners with the client.

This therapy allows people to not only find their voice but to use this voice for good, enabling them to become experts and live in a way that reflects their goals and values.

Context is considered

This therapy may also help the client view their problems differently. These can be social, political, and cultural, among others.

The clients recognize that these contexts matter and can influence how they view themselves and their stories.

What can narrative therapy help with?

Narrative therapy may help treat the symptoms of a variety of conditions, including:

Anxiety disorders

Depressive disorders

Eating disorders

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder ( ADHD )

Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD)

As well as mental health conditions, narrative therapy may also be useful for the following:

Those who feel like they are overwhelmed by negative experiences, thoughts, or emotions.

Those with attachment issues .

Those who are suffering from grief.

Those who have issues with low self-esteem.

Those who often feel powerless in many situations.

How is narrative therapy used?

For individuals, narrative therapy challenges the dominant problematic stories that prevent people from living their best lives.

Through the externalizing technique, people can learn to separate themselves from the problem.

They learn to identify alternative stories, widen their views of themselves, challenge old and unhealthy beliefs, and be open to new ways of living that reflect a more accurate and healthier story.

For couples or families, externalizing problems can facilitate positive interaction.

It can also make negative communication more accepting and meaningful. Seeing problems objectively can help couples and families reconnect and strengthen their relationships.

Once problems have been identified, this can be used to address how the problem has challenged the core strength of their bond.

How effective is narrative therapy?

Below are some of the studies which have investigated the effectiveness of narrative therapy:

A research study looked at evaluating the effectiveness of narrative therapy in increasing couples’ intimacy and its dimensions.

The results showed that this therapy significantly increased intimacy and on three dimensions of emotional, communication, and general intimacy, concluding that narrative therapy can provide valuable implications for the mental health of couples (Khodabakhsh et al., 2015).

Research has found that married women experienced increased levels of marital satisfaction after being treated with narrative therapy (Ghavibazou et al., 2020).

A study of adults with depression and anxiety looked at the effects of narrative therapy and found improvements in their self-reports of quality of life, and they had decreased symptoms of anxiety and depression (Shakeri et al., 2020).

A small sample pilot study aimed to determine whether narrative therapy was effective in helping young people with Autism who present with emotional and behavioral difficulties.

It was found that there were significant improvements in psychological distress and emotional symptoms (Cashin et al., 2013).

A study looked at the effectiveness of narrative therapy in boosting 8-10-year old’s social and emotional skills. The results showed that the children showed significant improvements in self-awareness, self-management, empathy, and responsible decision-making (Beaudoin et al., 2016).

A study explored group narrative therapy for improving the school behavior of a small sample of girls with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

Posttreatment ratings by teachers showed that there was a significant effect on reducing ADHD symptoms one week after completing the therapy sessions, and this was sustained after 30 days (Looyeh et al., 2012).

Limitations

One of the major limitations of narrative therapy is that research into its effectiveness is still lacking.

Further research is also needed to determine what mental health conditions narrative therapy might treat most effectively.

A reason for the lack of research is that it is still a relatively new approach to therapy. Another reason could be due to it being difficult to quantify.

The view that narrative therapists have is that knowledge is subjective and constructed by each person.

They accept there is no universal truth, so some narrative therapists make the argument that this therapy should be studied qualitatively rather than quantitatively.

How to get started

Narrative therapy is a specialized approach to counseling with training opportunities for therapists to learn how to use this approach with clients.

Finding the right therapist can involve looking online through therapist directories. Alternatively, you may consider asking your doctor to refer you to a professional in your area with the right training and experience.

It is important to choose the right therapist for you. Consider whether you feel comfortable discussing personal information with them. Don’t be afraid to seek a different therapist if the one you have does not quite suit your needs.

When choosing a therapist, consider thinking about what your deal breakers are, important qualities, and any other characteristics you value. 

What questions can you ask yourself when considering therapy?

When you are ready to select a therapist, think about the following:

1. What type of therapy do you want? – Do you want individual, couples, family therapy, or another type?

2. What are your main goals for therapy?

3. Whether you can commit the time each week – what days and times are most convenient for you?

What can be expected during the first therapy session?

During the first narrative therapy session, the therapist may ask you to begin sharing your story, and they may ask questions about why you are seeking treatment.

The therapist may also want to know about how your problems are affecting your life and what your goals for the future are.

Furthermore, they are likely to discuss aspects of treatment, such as how often you will meet and how your treatment may change from one session to the next.

What are some considerations for narrative therapy?

This therapy can be very in-depth, exploring a wide range of factors that can influence the development of your stories.

It also involves talking about problems as well as strengths which may be difficult for some people.

The therapist will help you to explore your dominant story in-depth and discover how it may be contributing to emotional distress, as well as uncover strengths that can help you to approach your problems differently.

You should expect to re-evaluate your judgments about yourself since narrative therapy encourages you to challenge and reassess these thoughts and replace them with more realistic or positive ones.

It also challenges you to separate yourself from your problems which can be difficult, but this process helps you learn to give yourself credit for making the right decisions for you.

Do you need mental health help?

Contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline for support and assistance from a trained counselor. If you or a loved one are in immediate danger: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

1-800-273-8255

Contact the Samaritans for support and assistance from a trained counselor: https://www.samaritans.org/; email [email protected] .

Available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year (this number is FREE to call):

Rethink Mental Illness: rethink.org

0300 5000 927

Further Information

Wallis, J., Burns, J., & Capdevila, R. (2011). What is narrative therapy and what is it not? The usefulness of Q methodology to explore accounts of White and Epston’s (1990) approach to narrative therapy. Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy, 18(6), 486-497.

Hutto, D. D., & Gallagher, S. (2017). Re-Authoring narrative therapy: Improving our selfmanagement tools. Philosophy, Psychiatry, & Psychology, 24(2), 157-167.

Morgan, A. (2000). What is narrative therapy? (p. 116). Adelaide: Dulwich Centre Publications.

Beaudoin, M. N., Moersch, M., & Evare, B. S. (2016). The effectiveness of narrative therapy with children’s social and emotional skill development: an empirical study of 813 problem-solving stories. Journal of Systemic Therapies, 35(3), 42-59.

Cashin, A., Browne, G., Bradbury, J., & Mulder, A. (2013). The effectiveness of narrative therapy with young people with autism. Journal of Child and Adolescent Psychiatric Nursing, 26(1), 32-41.

Ghavibazou, E., Hosseinian, S., & Abdollahi, A. (2020). Effectiveness of narrative therapy on communication patterns for women experiencing low marital satisfaction. Australian and New Zealand Journal of Family Therapy, 41(2), 195-207.

Khodabakhsh, M. R., Kiani, F., Noori Tirtashi, E., & Khastwo Hashjin, H. (2015). The effectiveness of narrative therapy on increasing couples intimacy and its dimensions: Implication for treatment. Family Counseling and Psychotherapy, 4(4), 607-632.

Looyeh, M. Y., Kamali, K., & Shafieian, R. (2012). An exploratory study of the effectiveness of group narrative therapy on the school behavior of girls with attention-deficit/hyperactivity symptoms. Archives of Psychiatric Nursing, 26(5), 404-410.

Shakeri, J., Ahmadi, S. M., Maleki, F., Hesami, M. R., Moghadam, A. P., Ahmadzade, A., Shirzadi, M. & Elahi, A. (2020). Effectiveness of group narrative therapy on depression, quality of life, and anxiety in people with amphetamine addiction: a randomized clinical trial. Iranian Journal of Medical Sciences, 45(2), 91.

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How Narrative Therapy Works

Jodi Clarke, LPC/MHSP is a Licensed Professional Counselor in private practice. She specializes in relationships, anxiety, trauma and grief.

Steven Gans, MD is board-certified in psychiatry and is an active supervisor, teacher, and mentor at Massachusetts General Hospital.

Verywell / Marina Li

What Is the Goal of Narrative Therapy?

Effectiveness, things to consider, how to get started.

Narrative therapy is a style of therapy that helps people become—and embrace being—an expert in their own lives. In narrative therapy, there is an emphasis on the stories that you develop and carry with you through your life.

As you experience events and interactions, you give meaning to those experiences and they, in turn, influence how you see yourself and the world. You can carry multiple stories at once, such as those related to your self-esteem , abilities, relationships, and work.

Developed in the 1980s by New Zealand-based therapists Michael White and David Epston, narrative therapy seeks to have an empowering effect and offer counseling that is non-blaming and non-pathological in nature.

There are a variety of techniques and exercises used in narrative therapy to help people heal and move past a problematic story. Some of the most commonly used techniques include the following.

Putting Together Your Narrative

Narrative therapists help their clients put together their narrative. This process allows the individual to find their voice and explore events in their lives and the meanings they have placed on these experiences. As their story is put together, the person becomes an observer to their story and looks at it with the therapist, working to identify the dominant and problematic story.

Externalization

Putting together the story of their lives also allows people to observe themselves. This helps create distance between the individual and their problems, which is called externalization . This distance allows people to better focus on changing unwanted behaviors. For example, a client might name anxiety “the Goblin” and explain to their therapist how they feel when "the Goblin" is around and how they cope with it.

As people practice externalization, they get a chance to see that they are capable and empowered to change.

Deconstruction

Deconstruction is used to help people gain clarity in their stories. When a problematic story feels like it has been around for a long time, people might use generalized statements and become confused in their own stories. A narrative therapist would work with the individual to break down their story into smaller parts, clarifying the problem and making it more approachable.

Unique Outcomes

When a story feels concrete, as if it could never change, any idea of alternative stories goes out the window. People can become very stuck in their story and allow it to influence several areas of their lives, impacting decision-making, behaviors, experiences, and relationships.

A narrative therapist works to help people not only challenge their problems but widen their view by considering alternative stories.

What Can Narrative Therapy Help With

While narrative therapy is a relatively new treatment approach, there is some evidence that it may be helpful for a variety of conditions. Mental health conditions it might help include:

• Attachment issues
• Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)
• Eating disorders
• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)

This approach can also be useful for anyone who feels like they are overwhelmed by negative experiences, thoughts, or emotions. This type of therapy stresses the importance of people not labeling themselves or seeing themselves as "broken" or "the problem," or for them to feel powerless in their circumstances and behavior patterns.

Narrative therapy allows people to not only find their voice but to use their voice for good, helping them to become experts in their own lives and to live in a way that reflects their goals and values. It can be beneficial for individuals, couples, and families. 

Benefits of Narrative Therapy

Narrative therapy holds a number of key principles including:

• Respect : People participating in narrative therapy are treated with respect and supported for the bravery it takes to come forward and work through personal challenges.
• Non-blaming : There is no blame placed on the client as they work through their stories and they are also encouraged to not place blame on others. Focus is instead placed on recognizing and changing unwanted and unhelpful stories about themselves and others.
• Client as the expert : Narrative therapists are not viewed as an advice-giving authority but rather a collaborative partner in helping clients grow and heal. Narrative therapy holds that clients know themselves well and exploring this information will allow for a change in their narratives.

Narrative therapy challenges dominant problematic stories that prevent people from living their best lives. Through narrative therapy, people can identify alternative stories, widen people's views of self, challenge old and unhealthy beliefs, and open their minds to new ways of living that reflect a more accurate and healthy story.

Narrative therapy does not aim to change a person but to allow them to become an expert in their own life.

Narrative therapy appears to offer benefits in the treatment of a number of different conditions and in a variety of settings. Some evidence supporting the effectiveness of this approach:

• One study found that adults with depression and anxiety who were treated with narrative therapy experienced improvements in self-reported quality of life and decreased symptoms of anxiety and depression.
• One study found that narrative therapy was effective at helping children improve empathy, decision-making, and social skills.
• Other research has found that married women experienced increased levels of marital satisfaction after being treated with narrative therapy.

Further research is needed to determine what mental health conditions narrative therapy might treat most effectively.

Narrative therapy may present some challenges that you should consider before you begin treatment. Some things to be aware of before you begin:

• This type of therapy can be very in-depth . It explores a wide range of factors that can influence the development of a person's story. This includes factors such as age, socioeconomic status, race, ethnicity, gender, and sexual identity. 
• It involves talking about your problems as well as your strengths . A therapist will help you explore your dominant story in-depth, discover ways it might be contributing to emotional pain, and uncover strengths that can help you approach problems in different ways.
• You'll reevaluate your judgments about yourself . Sometimes people carry stories about themselves that have been placed on them by others. Narrative therapy encourages you to reassess these thoughts and replace them with more realistic, positive ones.
• It challenges you to separate yourself from your problems . While this can be difficult, the process helps you learn to give yourself credit for making good decisions or behaving in positive ways.

This process can take time, but can eventually help people find their own voice and develop a healthier, more positive narrative.

Narrative therapy is a unique, specialized approach to counseling. There are training opportunities for therapists to learn more about narrative therapy and how to use this approach with clients.

Trained narrative therapists are located throughout the world and can be found through online resources and therapist directories. You might also consider asking your doctor to refer you to a professional in your area with training and experience in narrative therapy.

During your first session, your therapist may ask you to begin sharing your story and ask questions about the reasons you are seeking treatment. Your therapist may also want to know about how your problems are affecting your life and what your goals for the future are. You will also likely discuss aspects of treatment such as how often you will meet and how your treatment may change from one session to the next.

Wallis J, Burns J, Capdevila R. What is narrative therapy and what is it not?: The usefulness of Q methodology to explore accounts of White and Epston's (1990) approach to narrative therapy . Clin Psychol Psychother . 2011;18(6):486-97. doi:10.1002/cpp.723

Hutto DD, Gallagher S. Re-authoring narrative therapy: improving our self-management tools . Philosophy, Psychiatry and Psychology . 2017.24(2):157-167. doi:10.1353/ppp.2017.0020

Rice, Robert H. (2015). "Narrative Therapy." The SAGE Encyclopedia of Theory in Counseling and Psychology 2 , 695-700. 

Shakeri J, Ahmadi SM, Maleki F, Hesami MR, Parsa Moghadam A, Ahmadzade A, Shirzadi M, Elahi A. Effectiveness of group narrative therapy on depression, quality of life, and anxiety in people with amphetamine addiction: A randomized clinical trial . Iran J Med Sci . 2020;45(2):91-99. doi:10.30476/IJMS.2019.45829

Beaudoin M, Moersch M, Evare BS. The effectiveness of narrative therapy with children’s social and emotional skill development: An empirical study of 813 problem-solving stories . Journal of Systemic Therapies. 2016;(35)3: 42-59. doi:10.1521/jsyt.2016.35.3.42

Ghavibazou E, Hosseinian S, Abdollahi A. Effectiveness of narrative therapy on communication patterns for women experiencing low marital satisfaction . Australian & New Zealand Journal of Family Therapy . 2020;41(2):195-207.doi:10.1002/anzf.1405

Muruthi B, McCoy M, Chou J, Farnham A. Sexual scripts and narrative therapy with older couples . The American Journal of Family Therapy . 2018;46(1):81-95. doi:10.1080/01926187.2018.1428129

Dulwich Centre Publications. What Is Narrative Therapy?

Goodtherapy.org. Narrative Therapy .

Positive Psychology Program. 19 Narrative Therapy Techniques, Interventions and Worksheets .

By Jodi Clarke, MA, LPC/MHSP Jodi Clarke, LPC/MHSP is a Licensed Professional Counselor in private practice. She specializes in relationships, anxiety, trauma and grief.

Narrative Therapy

Reviewed by Psychology Today Staff

Narrative therapy is a form of counseling that views people as separate from their problems and destructive behaviors. This allows clients to get some distance from the difficulty they face; this helps them to see how it might actually be helping or protecting them, more than it is hurting them. With this perspective, individuals feel more empowered to make changes in their thought patterns and behavior and “rewrite” their life story for a future that reflects who they really are, what they are capable of, and what their purpose is, separate from their problems.

Michael White and David Epston developed this therapy type in the 1980s. They thought that an individual should see themselves as making a mistake, rather than seeing themselves as bad, per se. The individual is respectful of the self and does not point blame or judgment inward. A good narrative helps a person to process and clarify what they experience. In a paper that appeared in The Sage Encyclopedia of Theory in Counseling and Psychology, this modality can be useful for individuals.

There are core aspects of narrative therapy:

• The deconstruction of problematic and dominant storylines or narratives
• Breaking the narrative into smaller and more manageable chunks
• Rewriting the script of the problematic and dominant storylines
• Broadening your view and moving toward healthier storylines (this is also called the unique outcomes technique, which may help us better understand our experiences and emotions)
• What is true for one person may not be true for another person
• Externalizing the problem because you are not your problem
• A healthy narrative will also help us make meaning and see purpose
• When It's Used
• What to Expect
• How It Works
• What to Look for in a Narrative Therapist

Individuals, couples, and families can all benefit from narrative therapy . Those who define themselves by their problems, whose lives are dominated by such feelings as “I am a depressed person” or “I am an anxious person” can learn to see their problem as something they have but not something that identifies who they are.

This form of therapy can be helpful for people who suffer from these conditions, among others:

• Eating problems
• General difficulties with emotion regulation

Your therapist will encourage you to direct the conversation by asking what you prefer to talk about and, on an ongoing schedule, checking to see if the topic, which is most likely a problem, is still something you are interested in discussing. After some time, your therapist will lead you to tell other, more positive stories from your life to help you discover inherent traits and skills that can be used to address your problems. The goal is for you to see how there are positive and productive ways to approach your life and your future when you stop identifying yourself by your problems.

In narrative therapy, the events that occur over time in a person’s life are viewed as stories, some of which stand out as more significant or more fateful than others. These significant stories, usually stemming from negative events, can ultimately shape one’s identity . Beyond this identity, the narrative therapist views a client’s life as multitiered and full of possibilities that are just waiting to be discovered. The therapist does not act as the expert, but rather helps clients see how they are the experts regarding their own life and how they can uncover the dreams , values, goals , and skills that define who they are, separate from their problems. These are the buried stories that can be rewritten and woven into the ongoing and future stories of their lives.

A narrative therapist is a licensed mental health professional, social worker, or therapist who has additional training in narrative therapy through academic programs, intensive workshops, or online continuing education . In addition to checking credentials and experience, you should feel safe and comfortable working with any narrative therapist you choose.

Screen your potential therapist either in person or over video or phone. During this initial introduction, ask the therapist:

• How they may help with your particular concerns
• Have they dealt with this type of problem before
• What is their process
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Narrative Therapy Techniques (4 Examples)

Have you ever seen TikToks or memes that talk about “being the main character?” Sometimes they poke fun at different genres of movies, and sometimes they poke fun at ourselves. Other types of content encourage people to treat themselves as the main character of their own story.

These ideas aren’t just jokes or memes. They are found in a specific type of therapy that can help people process trauma, understand their feelings, and approach difficult situations in a more objective and realistic manner: narrative therapy.

What Is Narrative Therapy?

Narrative therapy is an approach that aims to empower people. In this approach, patients tell their story as if they were the protagonist in a book or a movie. Through this retelling, the patient goes through the typical "hero's journey" and personal development that is found in narratives.

Who Created Narrative Therapy?

Narrative therapy was developed in the 1980s by two therapists based in New Zealand, Michael White and David Epston.

Who Is Narrative Therapy Good For?

Although anyone can use narrative therapy as their main form of treatment, certain therapists may recommend it for some clients over others. Reddit user CurveoftheUniverse said, "While I was in grad school, I had a professor whose main schtick was narrative therapy. It didn't really grab me then, but now I find myself wishing I could have taken advantage of his knowledge. I find it really useful for adolescents since we start developing autobiographical memory around age 12."

Conscious-Section-55 said "Hi, my clinical supervisor used it as her go-to jam. I've used it a little but, more important, I often incorporate narrative interventions (most notably externalizing the problem) into my own integrative approach."

You can read the whole conversation about the benefits of narrative therapy here .

How Narrative Therapy Works

What feels more empowering than being a protagonist? Protagonists in movies, books, and television shows face obstacles and trauma, but always manage to rise up to the occasion and win in the end. If you can see yourself on that journey, you may find yourself seeing setbacks and trauma in a new light.

It’s not enough to just tell yourself that you are the main character of your story. You might already feel like the main character, but have just been telling yourself a story that isn’t helping you achieve your goals. There are an infinite amount of ways to tell a story. The “truth” of what happened to Goldilocks and the Three Bears probably looks different when you consider the story from the perspective of Goldilocks, Mama Bear, Papa Bear, Baby Bear, the bear’s neighbors, etc. By using the following techniques, you and your therapist can find the story that helps you feel the most empowered.

Techniques Used in Narrative Therapy

Writing the narrative.

The first piece of narrative therapy is writing your narrative. This is not something that everyone consciously does. When you first meet with a narrative therapist, you may find yourself collecting events, judgements, and behaviors that form this story. Your therapist will pick up on common themes. This is the base material for the upcoming techniques.

Often, people find themselves telling one story based on a “thin description.” Thin descriptions may have no basis in objective reality, but have made their way into being the dominant story of our lives.

Example of Narrative Therapy

Here’s an example. A patient experienced their father walking out on their family as a young child. They were left to take care of their mother, who blamed the child for their father’s actions. This one incident told the child to things: they had to take care of others, and they were unlovable.

As a child or young adult, a “thin” description like this can control your entire life. Whenever the child experiences rejection, they tell themselves they are unlovable. As they grow up and seek out romantic relationships , they tell themselves that the only way to keep their partner around is to take care of all of their needs. If they try to ask for any support or do anything from themselves, the partner will leave. The patient will see this as further evidence that they are unlovable.

Thin descriptions are the key to understanding why a person may make certain decisions or display certain behaviors. Once these descriptions are unlocked and the current narrative is created, the therapist and patient will move on to view the narrative from a more objective standpoint.

Externalization

If you grow up telling yourself that you are unlovable, you are going to unconsciously stick to that story. But think about this. What if your best friend were to tell you that they were unlovable? How might things change if your parent told you that? What if a random person in a Starbucks told you that? You’d probably think they were being ridiculous!

Now put yourself in your best friend, parent, or random person in Starbucks’ shoes. If you came up to them and said you were unlovable, despite the story you have been telling yourself for decades, they would also think that you were being ridiculous.

Therapists help patients create narratives so they can step out of their story and view it from an outsider’s perspective. This technique is called externalising.

When you see a friend, stranger, or main character in a book struggling, you are more likely to cheer them on. Why can’t you do the same with yourself? As you externalize and see your problems from an outsider’s perspective, you will be able to see other solutions and have confidence that you can overcome anything that is thrown at you.

Deconstruction

This journey that we are each on can feel overwhelming. Your story is your entire life. The feelings that someone may have of being unlovable, or being required to sacrifice themselves for others, that is their whole life. In order to put someone’s personal story into perspective, a therapist may ask their patient to deconstruct the story. Looking at individual incidents show just how “thin” some descriptions are.

Example of Deconstruction

A therapist may, for example, look at the incident that appeared to “start it all.” They may talk to their patient specifically about the moment when their dad left them. A child may not have the capacity to understand why a parent may leave their family. They turn the blame on themselves, because a child is at the center of their entire world. The child grows up to believe the story that they told themself as a child because they know no other story.

We are not given many opportunities to revisit these moments and deconstruct them. In therapy, patients may find themselves talking about incidents for the first time in years, or ever. During the deconstruction process, they see the incident in a new light. They might come to the realization that their father leaving them was not about them at all. Their father’s actions may have been caused by the father’s immaturity, their mother’s inability to be a good partner for their father, or a larger reason that has nothing to do with the mother and father at all. The “real” reason” doesn’t matter because in narrative therapy, patients and therapists must acknowledge that there is no “objective reality” or absolute truth. Our reality is created by the stories that we tell ourselves.

This process is easier said than done, but it creates a path for people to see their problems and tell their story in a new light.

Unique Outcomes

When you meet a character in a movie or book who is just unlovable and does nothing to change their ways throughout the story, you don’t have high hopes for them, do you? The same thing happens when we let one dominant story take over our life. If you were to only tell yourself that you were unlovable, you are not going to have hope that everything will turn around for you one day. You have no “proof” that you will reach that outcome.

Why Is Narrative Therapy Effective?

The beautiful thing about narrative therapy is that through writing the narrative, externalization, and destruction, you will start to see different outcomes for yourself. You will see that you are capable of growth and change. Breaking down a “thin” description prevents it from steering you onto one path. The end goal of this approach is to show you the many possibilities that you have for your future.

Did Sansa Stark let the woman she was in the past, and the beliefs she had, hold her back? No. Did Steve Harrington let his previous jock persona prevent him from becoming a protector to the kids in Stranger Things? No. Are you going to let the person you were in the past, or the incidents that happened outside of your control, right your story? No. Through narrative therapy, you can learn to write your own unique outcomes based on the person that you want to be and the goals you want to achieve.

How to Implement Narrative Therapy Into Your Life

Narrative therapy is a respectful approach that allows patients to look at their life without carrying blame or guilt for setbacks that they have faced. Through this practice, many patients have found a sense of self-compassion that they did not have before. If this approach to therapy interests you, I recommend looking for a therapist that has been trained in narrative therapy. You do not just have to be the main character of your life, going through setbacks and obstacles without any control over the ending to your story. Narrative therapy shows you that you can be the main character and the narrator and the author. The resolution to conflict is up to you. Your “happily ever after” is within your reach. Using this form of therapy, you can finally enjoy the story that you want to live.

How to Find a Therapist That Specializes in Narrative Therapy

You do not have to go on this journey alone. Narrative therapy was developed by therapists, and therapists use this technique on their clients. If you are interested in trying narrative therapy, reach out to a mental health counselor who can guide you.

Research therapists in your area who use narrative therapy.  A lot of therapy websites categorize local therapists by the approach they use. All you have to do is search "narrative therapy [your city here]" and start combing through the results!

Do a consultation.  Narrative therapy isn't for everyone, and therapists know that. To "screen" clients, therapists offer a free consultation. Often, these consultations are 15 to 20 minutes long. Before you get on the phone with a therapist, have questions ready. A few questions can be about narrative therapy:

• Do you offer narrative therapy?
• How do you approach narrative therapy?
• Do you think I'm a candidate for narrative therapy; why or why not?

In this conversation, you'll get a better sense if you feel comfortable with this therapist.

Be patient. It takes a long time to write a novel. Similarly, it takes a long time to write the story of your life. Be patient and enjoy the "wins" as they happen.

Related posts:

• The Psychology of Long Distance Relationships
• Beck’s Depression Inventory (BDI Test)
• Flooding Therapy (Psychology Definition + Explanation)
• Operant Conditioning (Examples + Research)
• Variable Interval Reinforcement Schedule (Examples)

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Nathan B. Weller

The Tree of Life: A Simple Exercise for Reclaiming Your Identity and Direction in Life Through Story

In my last post I shared a book that has made a profound impact on me. It’s called  Retelling the Stories of Our Lives: Everyday Narrative Therapy to Draw Inspiration and Transform Experience by David Denborough.

As I read this book so many things about the nature of stories and their role in human life came into sharp focus. Things that I have been working out for years on my own but could only vaguely express in comparison to the clarity I found in this book.

Just having the idea of using story to work through trauma or a crisis of identity validated was a big deal for me. I knew it was possible (because I had done it in my own life) but I was completely unaware that there was a whole subset of psychologists and therapists dedicated to using stories (in a non-religious context) to heal and empower people all over the world.

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To discover this has filled me with a new wellspring of passion for learning all that I can about the power, utility, and essential nature of stories. And of course, sharing those lessons with anyone who cares to read this blog.

That’s why I’m excited to share an exercise from Denborough’s book called The Tree of Life. It’s something literally anyone can do in under an hour and yet the results can positively shape the rest of your life.

Table of Contents

The Tree of Life Concept

The tree of life concept is pretty simple and straightforward. It is a visual metaphor in which a tree represents your life and the various elements that make it up–past, present, and future.

By labeling these parts, you not only begin to discover (or perhaps rediscover) aspects of yourself shaped by the past, but you can then begin to actively cultivate your tree to reflect the kind of person you want to be moving forward.

Just as we learned in my last post that the stories of our lives are the events we choose to highlight and contextualize, in this post we will learn how to discover and highlight alternate paths through our past–which in turn create new horizons in our future.

Follow the instructions below to give it a try for yourself.

The Tree of Life Exercise

The image below is an example of what the tree of life exercise will look like once complete. I was able to complete this rough draft in about an hour. The instructions below will describe how you can create your own.

The first step of course is to draw a tree. I’ve included a video below that should help if you feel lost. However, I should note that–at least for your first draft–it might be helpful to keep it rough. You can always go back later and redraw or touch-up your existing drawing for aesthetics. This round is all about getting the information down.

Next, follow the labeling instructions below. If you can only think of one or two things per section at a time, don’t worry about it. The nature of this exercise is that as you complete each step, it unlocks more memories and ideas for other parts. You can skip around and fill things in at any time. The most helpful thing in the beginning is to just write stuff down and see where it takes you. You might be surprised!

The Compost Heap ( Optional–But Highly Recommended! )

Write down anything in your compost heap that would normally go in the other sections described below but which are now things you no longer want to be defined by.

These are often sources of trauma, abuse, cultural standards of normality/beauty/etc. or anything else that shapes negative thoughts about yourself in your mind. You can write down places, people, problems, experiences. Whatever you need to.

I blurred mine out above, but you can see it has several items. Generally they all have to do with past trauma and damaging relationships I’m trying to let go of. I’ve found that the idea of a compost heap is an extremely helpful way to think about these things. Especially since many of them are not neatly categorized as “all bad”.

There are in fact quite a few life defining lessons I learned through the things that ended up in my compost heap. And like a compost heap is supposed to do, I will eventually break those things down and re-sow the rich parts back into my life.

You can do the same with yours.

Write down where you come from on the roots. This can be your home town, state, country, etc. You could also write down the culture you grew up in, a club or organization that shaped your youth, or a parent/guardian.

Write down the things you choose to do on a weekly basis on the ground. These should not be things you are forced to do, but rather things you have chosen to do for yourself.

Write your skills and values on the trunk. I chose to write my values starting at the base of the trunk going up. I then transitioned into listing my skills. For me this felt like a natural progression from roots to values to skills.

The Branches

Write down your hopes, dreams, and wishes on the branches. These can be personal, communal, or general to all of mankind. Think both long and short term. Spread them around the various branches.

Write down the names of those who are significant to you in a positive way. Your friends, family, pets, heroes, etc.

Write down the legacies that have been passed on to you. You can begin by looking at the names you just wrote on leaves and thinking about the impact they’ve had on you and what they’ve given to you over the years. This can be material, such as an inheritance, but most often this will be attributes such as courage, generosity, kindness, etc.

(Tip: if your tree is pretty crowded by this point, perhaps try drawing some baskets of fruit at the base of your tree and label them accordingly there.)

The Flowers & Seeds

Write down the legacies you wish to leave to others on the flowers and seeds.

(Tip: again, you may wish to de-clutter your drawing by visualizing saplings, baskets of flowers, etc. on which to write these items down.)

Going Further

After completing this exercise you are no doubt swimming with ideas and possibilities. My best advice is that if an idea has occurred to you that will help you process the things you have uncovered in a positive way, do it!

Here are three things that I have chosen to do as a follow up to my initial experience.

I’ve decided to journal about the various elements on my tree. I want to explore the connections between my roots, values, skills, people, etc. in a safe way before sharing it with others in any organized manner. But I do intend to share it with others. And I already know two of the ways in which I plan to.

Writing Letters

Some of the connections are pretty easy for me to determine. I know that I wrote certain values or lessons on my tree and immediately followed them up with the name of a person or group of people. These are the people who have instilled something special in me and I intend to tell them how much that means to me by writing some letters.

Meditation Through Art

I found that the drawing part of this exercise was particularly satisfying and therapeutic in and of itself. I’ve decided to follow this initial exercise up with some more study sketches of trees followed by a series of paintings and collages that express more than mere labels can. I hope to be able to share these with my friends, family, and community in the future too.

Final Thoughts

Even though I’ve spent this whole post talking about how great of an exercise this can be, I know how scary it can feel to take the first steps in claiming the storytelling rights over your life.  It usually means confronting aspects of our past that we might feel are better left unchallenged. And that’s a valid concern.

If you are worried that an exercise like this might stir up a lot of raw emotion or trigger traumatic flashbacks, I would encourage you to complete this exercise with a therapist. Or, at the very least, with a friend or family member who will be there to talk to you and support you through the process.

Regardless of how you choose to complete this exercise, or what personal spins you put on it (which is half the fun!), I’d love to hear how it goes. Feel free to reach out to me about it via any of my social channels, my contact page, or the comments section below.

Want more Storytelling content?

If you liked this post and would like to get more of my blog posts about Storytelling as they come out, join my Storytelling Newsletter!

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57 comments.

I’m a trauma psychologist who is redoing her website and want to included referrals to sites I think might be helpful to people recovering from childhood trauma.

I really like your site and would like to recommend it to my readers. Would you be interested that? If so, I’ll send you the site when it’s presentable.

My license and ethics do not allow me to ask for an affiliate kickback, so I expect nothing from you in return.

All the best,

Victoria Bentley, PsyD

Sure I think that would be great. Reference away :)

Greetings Nathan. I’m about to draw my tree of life! At 58, soon to be 59, I moved from West Africa to work in Bahraini. I’m excited and anxious and on my own. I really want to write a book of my life journey and get it published. Would be good to talk to you about help with getting started….

Hey Donna, so happy for you! I’m a big believer in understanding and recording one’s personal story. Whether that takes the form of a journal, vlog, or something more formal like a book. I wish you the best of luck on that journey. If you would like my help I do do story consulting. I can help you walk through this exercise and several more that will help you structure your life story and plot the events of your life into a coherent narrative. To be clear up-front though, most of my consulting is with big brands and my rates reflect that. I charge between $500 and $1500 per session depending on session length and the amount of prep work that needs to take place beforehand. If that still sounds like something you’re interested in please feel free to get in touch via my contact page :)

If you’re more interested in a DIY approach then I would recommend the following resources:

Watch The Power of Myth on Netflix. It’s an extended interview of Joseph Campbell by Bill Moyers.

Joseph Campbell is THE pioneer of mythic story structure. I’d also recommend his most popular and influential book, The Hero with a Thousand Faces , but for many it’s a bit too academic.

Another great read is The Writer’s Journey by Christopher Vogler . This book is a much more accessible take on Joseph Campbell’s work written specifically for writers.

Finally, if you’re really serious, I’d recommend you read The Seven Basic Plots: Why We Tell Stories by Christopher Booker . I found that the hero’s journey tends to focus on the “quest” plot in most case studies. However, this book is excellent in helping you recognize and create your own variations represented by the other six basic plots.

At the end of my dream this morning an Asian woman I was staring at (bc I thought she was someone else) caught my glance, became excited, and whispered to her companions, “maybe she’s the identity tree”and proceeded to move toward me. I woke up with those words ringing in my ears, and, bc I’ve had enough dreams with final messages that proved to be meaningful, I jumped on google and typed the words “identity tree. Above article was the first (and last) thing I read, and everything about it rings true and right for doing right now. And I’m also beginning work with a new therapist in two hours. 🙏

Hi Nathan. I just came across this today after painting my tree of life. I love the idea & am going to do the exercise. I come from a past of negativity & dysfunction & the l lengthy traumatic (abusive!) marriage. When I looked at my finished tree of life (painted), it spoke to mr about my life. My first thought was, your not completely healed yet. It was as if I were looking at a tangled web. I would love to share it with you. It too was a great exercise. I believe we use colour, like words as a form of expression. My tree, though quite bright, is just not bright enough yet…

Hey Diane, I’m glad that you’ve found some level of healing with this exercise. It’s totally an ongoing process. I’ve done this exercise several times over the years and each time things change a bit, some things come into clearer focus, while others fade further into my past. Hope your self work continues with great results!

Hi Victoria,

my wife, Suzanne would be interested in your childhood trauma work. Her contact info is below – thank you!

What a lovely idea! I’m excited to use this activity in a women’s retreat I’m hosting this weekend. Many thanks for sharing this!

My pleasure! I’d love to hear how it goes for you. Feel free to message me via my contact page: https://nathanbweller.com/contact/

Thank you, I am glad I found your site. It was easy to read and understand. I will be sitting down to draw my own tree and use this technique in my practice. I am definitely adding The Tree of Life to my must read list and subscribing to your blog. I am a clinical social worker and would like to link and or reference your site.

Thanks Jacqueline!

Hey! Thank you for sharing this magical life tree experience, I really enjoyed doing this task, the drawing, the writing, focusing on the people who affect me the most in life. It was a great opportunity to do a zoom in for myself and focus on me especially in today world which is full of distractions. Great page and topic. Thank you for sharing! I really enjoyed it.

Thanks for sharing !!! I’m organizing an event for women and would love to use this for the event.

Hi Nathan, Thanks for much for this post! I’ve offered a Tree of Life workshop to colleagues at my workplace as a team building exercise. I’m getting ready to offer another and always like to google for more inspiration. I’m so glad to find you and your Tree of Life. I’m going to add the idea of a compost heap to my workshop. Thanks so much for your inspiration!!!

That’s awesome! I’m glad you found value here :)

I am looking forward to really delving into this website and it’s resources. The Tree of Life will be a useful tool for rebuilding identity after continuing to move through a lot of recent trauma. Funny, I thought I would’ve been through with trauma after having overcome so much. But it seems right when I get to the top of the mountain, I start to unravel again. I take responsibility for my mistakes. I just hope that I can keep my faith and channel my anger and pain in healthy ways and not toward others be a cause that’s most important to me not to do.

Thanks for sharing that Julie. I’m glad you’ve found this resource helpful. Good luck on your journey!

Loved your article and drawing the tree. I would like to utilize your ideas in a class I will teach. I would like permission to use your article in the class with reference and credit to you and your site.

Hi Marcia, yes please do. Permission granted. Thanks!

Hellos!! Such a lovely and powerful technique. Even I wanted to ask, with your permission may I too use your link and help people discover such a lovely way. I am into sound healing and a reiki master

Yep, share away :)

I am a graduate student. I would like to know if I could use your picture for a class assignment.

Sure, no problem. You can use my sketch above.

Sorry, I meant the picture at the top of the page. It is beautiful. I would love to use the sketch also. Thanks for sharing your exercise; it would be perfect for groups sessions with my students.

Oh ok, well I can’t give permission for you to use my featured image since it’s not mine to begin with. Notice I have a link giving the source credit at the bottom of my own post. However, Unsplash images are free to use in almost every single case. So I’m sure it’s fine. You’ll just need to read the terms for this image and give credit if they require it.

Hi, just saw your tree of life. Found it very useful and interesting. Kindly allow me to use it for a workshop of school leaders. I would start working upon my tree of life.

Sure no problem. You can use it :)

(It’s not mine, but I’ve used it here out of a book–as I’ve stated in the post–so I’d recommend crediting the creator of the exercise and his book.)

I love this book too! Recognising and reframing our stories is so powerful. And this is such a client-centred and gentle approach too. Thanks for sharing.

Thanks Lynne!

Hello, I hope this text finds you doing well. I am a keen learner and as a facilitator to young youths. I found this piece (exercise) very helpful and interesting. It would help all range of people understand themselves to navigate challenges in life, planning way forward and acknowledge for what they receive.

looking forward to learning more from you.

Thanks for stopping by Yeshi!

Thanks for sharing this. It’s an excellent exercise. I celebrated God’s work in my life through the tree.

Glad you liked it Paul!

Hello Nathan, My name is Paul. I love this tree exercise. It is lifegiving! I work for the Canadian Baptists. I would like to share your exercise with our pastors in our spiritual practices guide. Would it be okay if I did that? I can include a link to your webpage in our email as well. Please let me know. Thanks, Paul

Hi Paul! Yes, please feel free to share this exercise with your group. I myself borrowed this from the narrative therapy book Retelling the Stories of our Lives . That might also be a good resource for your group.

You may also wish to acknowledge Ncazelo Ncube-Mlilo, the African women who originated the Tree of Life in support of sufferers of HIV. I believe David Denborough was inspired by her idea. Also David is now the Director of the Dulwich Centre in Adelaide, South Australia. They do some wonderful work with narrative therapy. You might like to add their link your site: (I have no other association with Dulwich other than being a follower.)

Thank you for putting Ncazelo Ncube-Mlilo on my radar. I will have to learn more about her and her work.

Apologies in my previous post, I should have referred to Ncazelo Ncube-Mlilo as South African (not African).

Hi! I find this article and the tree of life exercise very useful. May I also request permission to use this in the book I am writing, of course with the required recognition of the source, should this request be approved. Thank you and may you be given more opportunities to bless others through your works.

I don’t mind if you reference my blog, however I cannot give permission for the tree of life concept as I don’t have that authority.

Hi Nathan, I am a mental health therapist and have added your ideal of the compost heap to the original tree of life exercise, may I copy your directions and site your website?

Yes, feel free to share and link back. However, please give credit for the idea to David Denborough and his book.

Thank you so much, I plan on using this for my patients and I have also cited your name.

Thank you! Please also be sure to credit the original source–the book linked above.

This concept of the TREE OF LIFE is wonderful. I have always been looking at a concept like this one – now I found it. Will translate it into the German language, as I am living in Germany, running an Institute for Humanistic Psychology since 1972, the first one in Germany. Will include this concept in my Orientation Analysis programme of training. It is meant for the counseling situation, not for psychotherapy. I also make use of the East London University papers, which give detailled information on what should be asked to fill into the Tree of Life. Thank you very much.

Glad you found this exercise so helpful! As a Humanist Celebrant I’m interested in learning more about your Institute for Humanistic Psychology.

hello Dr Kluma, can you share what the East London Unv papers are? I also want to use Tree of Life in counseling. thanks,

Hello, Nathan.

Thank you so much for your writing. Very inspiring and informative. I would like to lead an “the Tree of Life” activity in a mentoring session with young adult in South Korea. I am happy to introduce your blog and the book by David Denborough. I found out that the original book was translated into Korean but no longer available unfortunately. I hope this activity ignites deeper discussion between mentees and mentors. Thank you again for your great work.

That is incredible. Good luck!

Hi Nathan my name is Latasha Thomas from Marshall Texas. Been going through things. Find my self going bk in time been through truma. This tree of life do it work. Well I will try it once I get settled in. Some where there Peace.

I’m sorry to hear you’re going through tough times. Hope you find that peace.

Thank you for this exercise. Love it. I´m a MHP in Sweden just finnished my education in Art in therapy. Im so interested in storytelling aswell. Will follow your page.

Thank you! And good luck in your new career!

Hi Nathan, I’m a mental health therapist, I use therapeutic horticulture in my practice as well. Thank you for sharing the details of how this exercise worked for you. It can be use in so many ways! With your permission I’d like to use this, as well as share in my practice. Giving you, your blog and David Denborough credit and backlinks, and referral to the book. I’m glad you decided to change the format of your blog :)

Thank you for the kind words! Yes, please do use it :)

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Narrative Practices: Therapeutic Letters

by Tiffany | Jul 30, 2018 | Narrative therapy practices , Writing

(This is an expansion of a post that was shared with my  Patreon  patrons earlier this month.)

I am learning how to do narrative therapy, how to be a narrative therapist, how to engage with my clients in ways that are narratively-informed. But what does that mean? What  is  narrative therapy? What does a narrative therapist  do ? What benefit does narrative therapy offer?

In this series of posts, I’m inviting readers to join me in the learning process. The first of these posts was shared in April, and was about using narrative practices of collective documentation as it was used in a group exercise of  Connecting To Our Skills . This post is also about documentation! (I really love generating documents, in case you couldn’t tell!)

This post is about  therapeutic narrative letters .

Narrative letters are an important part of narrative practice, and have been part of the field for years (and therapeutic letter writing is also present in other disciplines). I had written some letters to community members who consulted with me, but my recent trip to Sacramento to learn from the therapists at the Gender Health Center really encouraged me to explore this practice further. The therapists there, particularly David Nylund, use narrative letters regularly – both with community members and also between therapists and supervisors. I was able to hear some of those letters, and it was a moving experience.

Shortly after I returned from Sacramento, I ran a two-hour narrative group therapy session at Camp Fyrefly, and I wrote narrative letters to the participants. Each of the participants gave me permission to share these letters.

I learned a lot through this process of writing, and one thing I learned is that it takes a long time to write a narrative letter! I knew this from my earlier efforts, but writing to a group like this really brought home for me how challenging this practice is. And yet, despite that challenge, it is a practice I will be incorporating more regularly into my narrative work. This is not only because I value opportunities to create documents, but also because I think a letter can be a powerful thing and I want to offer something back to the community members who consult me. Something that, hopefully, offers them a tangible reminder of the ways in which they are responding to the problems in their lives, and that connects them with the stories of their lives.

This isn’t  just my own gut feeling, though. Other narrative therapists have written about the power of therapeutic letter writing.

In a 2010 paper, published in the International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work, Susan Stevens wrote:

Letter writing has been a wonderful way to assist my growing understanding of narrative practices, particularly in learning the various maps. Crafting a letter has required me to carefully reflect on conversations in a similar way to reviewing recorded sessions. I have found it has given me some space to really examine my practice and facilitate further learning. I have discovered opportunities that I have missed that I can then pursue in the letter, as well as positive moments that can be developed further. Letter writing following counselling sessions has created many more possibilities for working together than I initially envisaged. It has been a great privilege to work alongside people as they revise their relationships with significant problems in their lives. Hearing how the letters have supported people to construct preferred storylines of identity and celebrating their achievements toward this has been incredibly exciting.

In 2016, also in the International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work, Renee Butler wrote:

Letter writing in a counselling context has a long history (Watts, 2000) and in particular, the use of narrative documents has been heavily influenced by the field of anthropology (Myerhoff, 1992). Myerhoff talks about how we can be ‘nourished by our stories being fed back to ourselves’ (Myerhoff, 2007, p. 25), and one of the ways in which this can be done richly in practice is through offering documents that honour and acknowledge the stories we hear from the people who consult with us. In a narrative context, these types of therapeutic documents have been used with the purpose of creating double-story development, where the listener provides an acknowledgement of the problem as well as a rich description of an alternative story that was hidden within the dominant ‘problem’ story (White & Epston, 1990). White and Epston were interested in the value of therapeutic documents and because of this they undertook some informal research into the usefulness of this practice. They established that a good therapeutic document (or letter) was worth 4.5 sessions of good therapy (White, 1995) and concluded that engaging in this process was worth the time and energy needed by the therapist.

David Nylund (at the Gender Health Center, which I visited last month) has participated in research into the therapeutic efficacy of narrative letters. From a 2015 paper :

At the present time, there is not much evidence for the effectiveness of therapeutic letters in narrative therapy. However, both David Epston and Michael White (Freeman, Epston and Lobovits, 1997) have conducted informal clinical research, asking clients questions such as these: 1. In your opinion, how many sessions do you consider a letter such as the ones that you have received is worth? 2. If you assigned 100 per cent to whatever positive outcomes resulted from our conversations together, what percentage of that would you contribute to the letters you have received? The average response to Question 1 was that the letter had the equivalent value of 4.5 sessions. In response to Question 2, letters were rated in the range of 40% to 90% for total positive outcome of therapy. Such findings were replicated in a small-scale study performed at a large medical facility in California. Nylund and Thomas (1994) reported that their respondents rated the average worth of a letter to be 3.2 face-to-face interviews (the range was 2.5–10) and 52.8% of positive outcome of therapy was attributed to the letters alone. As supported by this research, the amount of time it takes to write letters seems worth the effort.

So a narrative letter can be the therapeutic equivalent of 3.2-4.5 narrative therapy sessions. And it can assist in my own development as a narrative therapist, and enrich the experience of the community members who consult me. That seems like a really important practice to develop, especially since a lot of the folks consulting me do not have the finances to sustain frequent or extended therapeutic work.

But it’s hard work! And it takes a long time. For me, as a newbie to the practice, these four letters took me almost 12 hours, and many drafts.

I’m not sure exactly how this practice will develop in my work, since I won’t be able to write a narrative letter for every session. But it’s certainly something that I am considering, and if you are interested in working with me and are particularly keen on letters being part of our therapeutic relationship, let me know!

I’m sharing these four letters for two reasons.

First, because I think that the insider knowledge shared during our group conversation was valuable and might help other folks. Sharing these letters means that you have an opportunity to read and respond, and if anything particularly resonates for you, you can send me your response and I can share it back with the community members.

And second, because I’m “showing my work” and inviting you to see what happens behind the scenes as I learn.

Anyway! Here they are!

The letter to the group:

Dear A., E., and J.,

It has taken me a while to get these letters written.

Every time I sat down to write, I got lost in the wealth of information and insight that was shared during our conversation. I could write you each a whole novel! But that wouldn’t be a very good narrative letter.

Each draft of the letter that I wrote just didn’t seem to work. I couldn’t figure out how to make it coherent, how to shape it into something meaningful. I wanted to answer some critical questions:

What stands out the most to me when I think about our conversation?

What moved me in our conversation?

What do I want to note, and hopefully in a way that offers something meaningful back to you?

You were each so generous with your time, your energy, and your stories.

After many attempts, I realized that the problem was in trying to write a single letter to the group, rather than specific letters to each of you. Although there was so much resonance between your stories, you each brought something unique to the conversation. In trying to compress my response into a single letter, I kept losing the richness of the diversity in your contributions and your shared stories. And, since camp is so much about honouring and holding space for diversity, I finally realized what I needed to do! So, four letters. This one, and one to each of you.

As I mentioned during our conversation, this practice of writing narrative letters is new to me – I have done a lot more work in collective documentation. In collective documentation, I take a group conversation, and then generate a document or resource that shares the insights and stories with a broader audience. In those documents, I am sharing outward from the group, and a single document makes sense!

What I found as I tried to write this letter (now ‘these letters’) was that it is a bit of a different thing when I am writing inward, to the group , rather than outward, from the group .

One of the things that everyone in the conversation shared was the commitment to holding space for complexity, and for valuing the well-being of the people around us.

This was true for each of you, and it belongs here, in the group letter.

There was an ethic of care that extended in multiple directions – from the counsellors to the campers, from the campers to each other, from the campers to the counsellors, and from the counsellors to each other. This multi-directional, complex, compassionate care was beautiful to see.

My favourite quote from our conversation, and the one that has stuck with me, was this – “Giving up hope on a solution by generating hope for a process.”

I think that throughout our conversation, we found very few solutions. We talked about problems that are ongoing, that are supported and strengthened by the oppressive and marginalizing systems around us. Problems with deep roots and wide-ranging impacts. We did not solve these problems in our conversation – Imposter Syndrome (supported as it is by capitalism, by individualist culture, by hierarchies of knowledge, by a culture that values “expertise” and “productivity” in very specific ways); Guilt (supported internally and externally, by our desire to take care of each other, and also by social contexts that leave very little room for imperfection, failure, and growth); Comparison; and others.

So, no solutions.

But so many steps towards process, and so much hope for process.

These processes include harm reduction, disconnecting from value-judgements, holding and curating space for ourselves and each other, imagining ourselves and each other with complexity and compassion, naming our memories, seeking external validation and choosing to receive it, recognizing the potential for growth in failure, and so much more.

These processes, informed by your insider knowledge into navigating the problems in your lives, are full of hope.

I feel fortunate to have been able to particulate in such a rich and hope-filled conversation.

And I appreciate your patience with how long it has taken me to work my way through this process. I am incredibly thankful for this learning opportunity.

The letter to A.

Thank you for being part of the narrative therapy conversation. I know that you said there are not many places where you’re able to talk about your feelings openly, because you’re worried about how that might impact the people around you.

As I worked on this letter, I kept thinking about what it means that you have maintained a connection to your desire to share, which you said is healthy for you, despite the fact that you have fewer spaces for that sharing.

What has allowed you to stay aligned with that desire to seek out safe spaces to share your feelings, while also looking out for the people around you?

I also wonder if you were able to find more of those spaces for sharing while you were at camp, and how you navigated those opportunities and conversations.

One of the stories that you shared, that has really stuck with me, had to do with how you’ve responded to and resisted one of the problems in your life. This problem is related to Comparison. There are moments when you witness friends laughing together and you might get thinking, “I should have been the one to make them laugh.”

A., you mentioned that sometimes you really get in your head about it, and even when it starts as a small thought, this feeling of Comparison can get pretty big and loud. In navigating these hard situations, you’ve developed a skill of Naming Memories, to quiet the mean voice that tries to convince you your friends might not care about you if you aren’t the one who always makes them laugh, or if you aren’t always their first choice for an activity.

This skill of Naming Memories lets you stay connected to your knowledge that you’re still important even when someone else is busy.

I wonder if there are any people in your life, either now or in the past, and either real or fictional heroes and inspirations, who might support you in this skill of Naming Memories? Do you have cherished memories that you return to more often when you are resisting Comparison and Fear?

In all of your stories there were so many references to caring for the people around you, even when expressing that care meant making hard choices; giving space to a friend even when it’s the hardest thing, and reaching out to other friends even when you might want to keep just one person close.

Your hard work is paying off, and I wonder what else might become possible as you continue to do the hard thing in order to care for yourself and the people around you.

I also wonder, do you think there might be a time when the “hard thing” becomes less hard? What might that look like?

It was really inspiring to hear about how you have taken action to respond to the problems that show up in your life.

You shared the story of going to an event, and chatting with a totally new person, despite the fact that you have a hard time talking with new folks! Your friends were enthusiastic and proud of you. J. also shared a story of receiving validation from her community, and how helpful that was. E. pointed out what an active process it is to receive validation, and to choose to believe that what someone says is true. When you shared this story of attending the conference and reaching out to a new person, it touched on a shared experience in the group of reaching for and finding validation in the people around us.

One other thing jumps out at me when I remember our conversation – you mentioned a few times that you are learning to “stop thinking in black and white”, and we talked a bit about what that means, and how there is now more range of colour in your life, and more possibilities.

What does it look like, when you can see your life in this expanded range of colours?

It was an honour to share narrative space with you, and I hope that camp offered you a rich range of experiences and possibilities.

The letter to J.

First, it was such a pleasure to meet you, and a gift to have you endorse my work to A. and E. When you mentioned that my work has been helpful for you, it meant so much to me. Thank you.

I so appreciated your willingness to open up our conversation by sharing about how Imposter Syndrome has sometimes got you thinking that you aren’t worthy of taking up space, that you don’t belong, and that you aren’t qualified.

This Imposter Syndrome has shown up for you at various times in your life, and this resonated for all of us in the conversation.

You had really noticed it showing up for you at camp.

You’d seen other counsellors making connections and demonstrating how attuned they are to their campers, and you’d felt that as a gap in your own experience so far. You hadn’t had that chance for a one-on-one sit-down with a camper, and that had been hard. It was discouraging.

I wonder if you did get that chance to have a one-on-one sit down with a camper before camp ended?

I also wonder what it might mean to the campers, if they knew that you were paying such close attention to their needs, and so committed to making sure that campers who needed a one-on-one chat were able to access it?

I saw this awareness and commitment to community care put into action when you witnessed E.’s story and immediately responded by sharing that you had heard from campers that E. offered “the queer space to feel safe in.”

When you were talking about the effects of this Imposter Syndrome and the dreams you had of showing up for your campers and connecting on a personal level, I heard a strong commitment to community care, and an awareness of the people around you and what they might need. I heard you wanting to be part of creating safer spaces, and offering campers the opportunity to have their experiences even when those experiences might be uncomfortable or challenging. Rather than simply looking for solutions, you were, as E. framed it, “generating hope for the process.”

I also want to honour that you had experienced some disappointment, and even some guilt, about not having had those opportunities for one-on-one connection yet. In those moments when Guilt shows up, sometimes it has you wanting to disappear in order to make things better, because you are valuing other people’s experiences and their well-being.

This really seemed to resonate with what A. said about sometimes feeling like a downer, and Guilt showing up in those moments. E. also seemed to connect with this idea.

I was really interested in the story that you shared about receiving validation from your coworkers, and how this was a bit of an antidote to the Imposter Syndrome.

You actually went into social work (amazing!) because of the feedback that you got from your coworkers – they saw something in you, and encouraged you in this direction. You actively sought out that feedback, and chose to accept it. As E. pointed out, receiving validation is an active process of choosing to believe that what someone says is true.

I wonder what it means to your coworkers that you valued their opinion so much?

And I wonder if it makes it possible for them to feel connected to your work in the world, knowing that they were part of that process?

What might you say to Imposter Syndrome if it shows up for you again?

Do you have any ideas for how you can resist Guilt when it makes you want to disappear?

Are there ways that you can strengthen your relationship with Trusting Validation?

I would love to hear how things go for you as you continue to resist and respond to these problems, and cultivate your values of community care, connection with others, and doing justice in the world.

I hope that the rest of your camp experience was rich and rewarding.

The letter to E. 

Thank you for being part of the narrative conversation at Camp fYrefly.

I really appreciated your contributions to the conversation, and some of what you said about holding complexity has really stuck with me and informed some of the narrative sessions I’ve facilitated in the last week.

I’m new to the process of narrative letters, and still trying to figure out where my voice is. I’ve left your letter to last, because I want to respond with my Big Feelings, and I’ve been worried about whether that’s how I’m “supposed” to do narrative letters. But I’m taking some advice from you, and removing my value judgement from these Big Feelings.

E., when you spoke about feeling like you were not able to be fully present because some of your own big stories had been brought up at camp, that really hit me. I struggle with this myself, and with the guilt over it. I want to make a difference in the world, and I want to create spaces and facilitate conversations that open up a wider range of possible responses for people who are responding to the problems in their lives. Michael White, who was a founder of narrative therapy, said that “deficit-focused stories present a narrow range of potential responses” and I really agree with this. But it can be so difficult to move away from a deficit-centered story when painful history intrudes into the present.

It was so encouraging and inspiring for me to see you show up, be present , despite the stories that had come forward for you. Even though you said that you were struggling with being present, your contributions were still so compassionate, insightful, and resonant.

This made me think about whether we make a difference even when we feel ourselves to be at a distance. It got me thinking about the value of my own work, even in the moments when I feel so far away from the self and the work that I most want to be and do. Thank you.

During the conversation, you shared your insider knowledge into what an active process it is to receive validation, and to choose to believe that what someone says is true.

This is a valuable insight, and I became curious about how you came to this knowledge. Have there been people in your life who made this work, which is often so overlooked, visible? How have you learned to see and validate this work in your own life, and in others’ lives?

You also shared that you have worked hard to value your big feelings, which happen in lots of directions. You’ve had some help in this work from skills like Introspection and Challenging Ideas, but you’ve also worked on holding space for feelings even when they are “bad” ones. You talked about how much growth and opportunity exists in failure, and how failure makes things possible but it still sucks.

I really appreciated how each of your comments demonstrated your close relationship with complexity and space-holding.

I also appreciated what you said about how you’ve worked with reimagining yourself as the villain. I’m really interested in this idea.

What villains have inspired you? Which villains have offered you insights into holding space for your own complex story?

It was a pleasure to meet you, and I hope that camp offered you a rich, and deliciously complex, set of experiences.

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20 Positive Psychotherapy Exercises, Sessions and Worksheets

The word “psychotherapy” often evokes images of nerve-wracked patients reclining on couches, a stern therapist with furrowed brows and a notepad, and a deep uneasiness linked to the identification and analysis of every childhood trauma you have suffered, whether you remembered it before the session or not.

Although this is an outdated and largely inaccurate idea of psychotherapy, it still may seem counterintuitive to combine positive psychology with psychotherapy.

Psychotherapy is typically reserved for those with moderate to severe behavioral, emotional, or personality issues—not people who are often happy and healthy, and also struggle with occasional stress.

How can this type of therapy, which deals with such serious and difficult subject matter, possibly be considered “positive?”

Fortunately, many respected psychologists have been working to develop a useful and evidence-based positive approach to psychotherapy over the last two decades.

These pioneering researchers have married the research of positive psychology and the science and practice of psychotherapy into a life-affirming alternative to traditional psychotherapy—one that focuses on your strengths instead of your weaknesses, and works towards improving what is good in life instead of mitigating that which is not (Seligman, Rashid, & Parks, 2006).

It does not replace traditional psychotherapy, but can act as an extremely effective supplement to help a person move from “just getting by” to flourishing and thriving! For more on this effective ‘supplement’, we share a variety of exercises, tools and a range of therapy sessions.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Positive Psychology Exercises for free . These science-based exercises will explore fundamental aspects of positive psychology including strengths, values, and self-compassion, and will give you the tools to enhance the wellbeing of your clients, students, or employees.

This Article Contains:

5 positive psychotherapy exercises and tools, 15 sessions – exercises and tools, a take-home message.

Here is an overview of some of the most effective exercises and tools in a positive psychotherapist’s toolbox.

1. Gratitude Journal

One of the simplest yet most effective exercises in positive psychology is a  gratitude journal . Evidence has shown that developing gratitude for the things in your life that you may otherwise take for granted, can have a big impact on your outlook and satisfaction with your life (Davis et al., 2016; Sheldon & Lyubomirsky, 2006).

The practice of keeping a gratitude journal is quite simple and easy to explain to a client who might need a boost in positive emotions.

As a therapist or other mental health professional, instruct your client to do the following:

• Get a notebook or journal that you can dedicate to this practice every day.
• Every night before bed, write down three things that you were grateful for that day.
• Alternatively, you can write down five things that you were grateful for on a weekly basis.
• Encourage them to think of particular details from the day or week, rather than something broad or non-specific (i.e., “the warm sunshine coming through the window this afternoon” rather than “the weather”).

If your client is having trouble thinking of things they are grateful for, tell them to try thinking about what their life would be like without certain aspects. This will help them to identify the things in their life they are most grateful (Marsh, 2011).

2. Design a Beautiful Day

Who doesn’t want to design a beautiful day for themselves?

This exercise is not only fun for most clients, but it also carries a double impact: the planning of the near-perfect day, and the actual experience of the near-perfect day.

As a counselor or therapist, encourage your client to think about what a beautiful day means to them.

What do they love to do? What do they enjoy that they haven’t had a chance to do recently? What have they always wanted to do but have never tried?

These questions can help guide your client to discover what constitutes a beautiful day to them. Direct your client to pick a day in the near future and design their day with the following tips in mind:

• Some alone time is fine, but try to involve others for at least part of the day.
• Include the small details that you are looking forward to in your plan, but don’t plan out your entire day. Leave some room for spontaneity!
• Break your usual routine and do something different, whether it’s big or small.
• Be aware that your beautiful day will almost certainly not go exactly as planned, but it can still be beautiful!
• Use mindfulness on your beautiful day to soak in the simple pleasures you will experience throughout the day.

3. Self-Esteem Journal

The self-esteem journal is another straightforward but effective exercise for clients suffering from feelings of low self-worth.

This Self-Esteem Journal For Adults provides a template for each day of the week and three prompts per day for your client to respond to, including prompts like:

• Something I did well today…
• Today I had fun when…
• I felt proud when…
• Today I accomplished…
• I had a positive experience with…
• Something I did for someone…

The simple act of noticing and identifying positive things from their day can help clients gradually build their self-esteem and enhance their wellbeing. Sometimes all we need is a little nudge to remember the positive things we do!

4. Mindfulness Meditation

Mindfulness meditation can be an excellent tool to fight anxiety, depression, and other negative emotions, making it a perfect tool for therapists and counselors to use with their clients.

To introduce your client to mindfulness meditation, you can try the “ mini-mindfulness exercise ,” a quick and easy lesson that only takes a few minutes to implement.

Follow these steps to guide your client through the process:

• Have your client sit in a comfortable position with a dignified but relaxed posture and their eyes closed. Encourage them to turn off “autopilot” and turn on their deeper awareness of where they are, what they are doing, and what they are thinking.
• Guide them through the process of becoming aware of their breath. Instruct them to take several breaths without trying to manipulate or change their breathing; instead encourage them to be aware of how it feels as they inhale air through the nostrils or mouth and into the lungs, as they hold the air for a brief moment, and as they exhale the air again. Direct their attention to how their chest feels as it rises and falls, how their belly feels as it expands and contracts, and how the rest of their body feels as they simply breathe.
• Direct your client to let their awareness expand. Now, they can extend their focus beyond their breath to the whole body. Have them pay attention to how their body feels, including any tightness or soreness that may be settled into their muscles. Let them be present with this awareness for a minute or two, and tell them to open their eyes and continue with the session or with their day when they are ready.

Once your client is introduced to mindfulness meditation, encourage them to try it out on their own. They may find, as so many others have, that mindfulness can be a great way to not only address difficult or negative emotions but maintain positive ones throughout the day as well.

5. Values in Action Inventory of Strengths (VIA-IS)

The VIA-IS is one of the most commonly used tools in positive psychology, and it has applications in positive psychotherapy as well. Completing this questionnaire will help your clients identify their dominant strengths— allowing them to focus their energy and attention on using their inherent strengths in their daily life, instead of getting distracted by the skills or traits they may feel they are lacking.

The VIA-IS is reliable, validated, and backed by tons of scientific research, and best of all – it’s free to use (Ruch, Proyer, Harzer, Park, Peterson, & Seligman, 2010).

Direct your clients to the VIA website to learn about the 24 character strengths and take the VIA-IS to discover their own top strengths.

These strengths are organized into six broad categories as follows:

Wisdom and Knowledge

• Creativity;
• Love of learning;
• Perspective.
• Perseverance;
• Social intelligence.
• Leadership.
• Forgiveness;
• Self-regulation .

Transcendence

• Appreciation of beauty and excellence;
• Gratitude ;
• Spirituality.

Once your client has taken the survey and identified their top 5 strengths , instruct them to bring in their results and have a discussion with them about how they can better apply these strengths to their work, relationships, recreation, and daily life.

The order of sessions outlined below is merely suggestive but there are some essential components that should be maintained to increase long term effectiveness and enhance learning.

While every session introduces new exercises and tools, it is also recommended that some form of restorative technique is used at the beginning and at the conclusion of every session.

For each session, we also suggest one homework assignment to facilitate maintenance in between sessions.

If you are a therapist who regularly assigns homework to your clients, we recommend checking out the platform Quenza to help digitize and scale this aspect of your therapy practice.

The platform incorporates a simple drag-and-drop builder that therapists can use to craft a range of digital activities for their clients to complete in between therapy sessions. These activities can include audio meditations, reflections, self-paced learning modules, and more.

Once done, the therapist can then share these activities directly to their clients’ devices, such as the Daily Reflection on the right, track their progress using Quenza’s dashboard, and send follow-up reminders to complete the activities via push notification.

Additionally, one size does not fit all when introducing any practice including mindfulness, so fit should be carefully considered and special attention should be paid to cultural considerations.

Session I – Positive Inception

Goal : Exploration of strengths and positive attributes is accomplished by inviting the client to share a personal story that shows them at their best as a form of introduction.

Tool : Positive Introduction prompt

Rationale : Initial session is intended to set a positive tone for the on-going practitioner-client interaction. Building rapport both at the outset and throughout the relationship are key factors to better outcomes from a therapeutic process.

One positive psychotherapy practice recommended for this session is a positive introduction. A positive introduction is based on principles of Appreciative Inquiry and involves asking a client to recall a positive event in his or her life that ended very well.

Positive memories can generate positive emotions and improve mood regulation. Positive narratives also help restore healthier self-concept and allow the client to build resources in terms of new ideas and perspectives (Denborough, 2014).

In-session Resources:

• Positive Introduction

Describe an event in your life where you handled a difficult situation in a positive way and things turn out well. It does not have to be a major event but try to think of something that brought out the best in you. Write about the situation in form of story with a beginning, middle and positive end: ____________

Discussion questions:

• Tell me how this event influenced how you see yourself?
• What about you specifically helped you deal with this situation?
• Are other people aware of this story in the way you described it?

Homework : As homework, clients can create anchors out of these positive memories by collecting pictures or artifacts that remind them of the pleasant memory. The practitioner can also provide the client with an option to seal this positive introduction in an envelope to be opened at a later date and kept by the practitioner for safekeeping.

Lastly, the client should be encouraged to write similar stories and keep them handy for a quick pick me up.

Practitioner can also suggest that client asks others to share their inspiring stories, that client share more stories like this one and pay attention to what they say about themselves, what themes keep recurring, how their stories change depending on audience, what role they play in their own stories and whether they are a victim or a survivor.

Clinician notes:

Pay careful attention and take notes as the narratives will tend to form sequences.

If a client has a difficulty recalling positive events, they can ask family or friends to recall for them or they can tell a story of someone they admire.

Session II – The Powers Within

Goal : To assess signature strengths and to cultivate engagement through daily activities by choosing tasks that speak to one’s strengths.

Tool : Signature Strengths Assessment

Rationale : Exercising specific strengths can facilitate goal progression and contribute to wellness and personal growth (Linley, Nielsen, Gillett, & Biswas-Diener, 2010). Psychology of motivation teaches us that there are keystone habits that spark positive changes in other areas related to the one being made, so can certain strengths support the healing and growth process. Strength assessment is given, and the concept of engagement is explained.

Preparation:

Prior to the session, the client should ask three people to report on their strengths.

In-session Worksheets:

• Your Core Values

Read carefully the descriptions of 24 character strengths below. They can be found in the VIA Institute on Character website .

Circle 5 of the strengths that you find yourself exercising most often and that you feel characterize you the most:

List your 5 signature strengths and then answer questions and prompts to determine the key markers of your signature strengths.

• Authenticity: Is this strength a part of who I am at the core?
• Enthusiasm: While using this strength I feel excited and joyous.
• Learning: Is it natural and effortless for me to use this strength?
• Persistence: I find it difficult to stop when I use this strength.
• Energy: When I use this strength, do I feel invigorated and full of zest?
• Creativity: Do I find new ways and design projects to use this strength?

Pick one or two and try to describe specific experiences or anecdotes associated with expression of that strength: _____________

Now consider the client’s peer feedback. The reports will probably not be identical, but some significant overlap is highly likely.

Circle any areas of considerable overlap and try to identify the following:

• Signature strengths – these have been mentioned several (3-4 times) by the client’s feedback providers
• Potential blind spots – strengths mentioned by others, but not the client themselves.
• How confident do you feel about knowing your signature strengths after completing the assessment?
• How well do your strengths reflect your personality?
• Which of the strengths you identified have always been there and which have you acquired at some point in your life?
• Which signature strengths stood out for you in terms of specific markers like authenticity, energy or learning?

Homework : Instruct clients to take VIA strengths survey assessment and ask that they observe if using signature strengths produces greater engagement.

Clinician notes :

Reminders are tangible cues in our environment that focus our attention on a particular commitment we made. Reminders help anchor a new habit of thought and behavior.

They can be simple or more complicated and creative like a screen saver on the clients’ phone, a bracelet or a keychain that reminds them of their signature strengths, a picture on the wall of the person who motivates them or an entry in their planner with times for a podcast that encourages them to practice and reflect.

Session III – Amplify Your Internal Assets

Goal : To gain a deeper understanding of optimal levels of usage of strengths. Use your signature strengths to be happier as well as to develop skills. Use your strengths to manage your negatives.

Tool : Optimizing Strengths exercise

Rationale : Biswas-Diener, Kashdan, and Minhas (2011) argue against just identifying one’s strengths as it represents a fixed mindset and decreases motivation. He suggests that we should treat strengths as “potentials for excellence” to foster belief in the possibility of improvement where therapy can lead us to develop them further.

Development of practical intelligence can be initiated through considering how client’s strengths can be translated into concrete purposeful actions that enhance commitment, engagement and problem-solving.

• Optimizing Strengths

Read the common scenarios below and reflect on the potential of under and overuse of strengths:

• Someone is feeling sad or appears disinterested and apathetic
• Someone obsesses over small details and worries too much about things you perceive as insignificant
• Someone is always volunteering and takes on too many commitments and projects
• Someone is often playful and humorous
• Some fail to confront another for inappropriate behavior

Discussion questions :

• What behaviors let you know you’re overusing or underusing your strengths?
• What specific circumstances trigger your overuse or underuse of strengths?
• What cultural or personal history factors could reinforce your over- or underuse of strengths?
• If you’re overusing one strength, what other strength could counterbalance that overuse?

For between sessions assignment, ask the client to describe a current challenge and then reflect on the following questions:

• Is it due to overuse or underuse of strengths?
• What aspects of this challenge would you like to change?
• What strengths can you use in this situation?
• What are the implications on others of using these strengths?
• In what way can you calibrate the use of these strengths to improve the situations?

In imparting practical wisdom strategies make sure clients perceive this as the development of a strength, not merely as use of a well-developed strength. Practical wisdom strategies are:

• Translate strengths into specific actions and observe the outcome
• Consider if strengths are relevant to the context
• Resolve conflicting strengths through reflecting on the possible outcomes of the use of these strengths
• Consider the impact of your strengths on others
• Calibrate according to changing circumstances

Session IV – You at Your Best

Goal : Visualize a better version of yourself.

Tool : You at Your Best Worksheet

Rationale : Our visions of who we wish to become in the future, be it our best selves, our ideal selves or simply our better selves, reflect our personal and professional goals and are created by imagining a better version of who we are today and then striving toward it.

Cultivating and sustaining desirable action can bring us closer to that future self and it may require that we refrain from behaviors that deter us and change old habits that don’t serve us.

Ideal selves reflect our hopes, dreams, and aspirations, and speak to our skills, abilities, achievements, and accomplishments that we wish to attain (Higgins, 1987; Markus & Nurius, 1986).

Research supports this phenomenon of movement toward ideal selves and shows that it predicts many positive outcomes: life satisfaction, emotional wellbeing, self-esteem, vitality, relational stability, relational satisfaction (Drigotas, 2002; Drigotas, Rusbult, Wieselquist, & Whitton, 1999; Kumashiro, Rusbult, Finkenauer, & Stocker, 2007; Rusbult, Kumashiro, Kubacka, & Finkel, 2009).

• You At Your Best

1. Find your story.

Recall a recent time or event when you were at your absolute best. You might have been overcoming a serious challenge, or perhaps you made someone else’s life better.

Think about what made you feel happier, more alive. Maybe you were:

• more relaxed,
• more grounded,
• more enthusiastic,
• more energized,
• more engaged,
• more creative,
• more connected,
• more reflective,

Describe your story as clearly as possible, allowing the details in your narrative to demonstrate your strengths and values.

What happened? What was your part in it? How did you feel?

3. Beginning, Middle, End

Craft your narrative with a start, middle, and powerful ending. It may help to replay the experience in your mind as it happened.

Highlight or circle any words that you feel might relate to your personal strengths.

5. Find your Strengths

List the strengths you’ve identified from the exercise.

• How can you move toward this better version of you?
• How can you use your signature strengths?
• What concrete action can you commit to?
• What barriers do you see and what and who can help?
• How different is your life once you’ve made the change?

Homework : Commit to specific actions for the week. Name someone who is willing to support you. Decide on how often this person will check in on your progress and how.

Clinician notes : Remind the client that less is more, and that a long list is bound to fail because cognitive overload is likely to lead them to do nothing. Modest aspirations translate into small wins that lead to gradual change. Reinforcing new behaviors takes time and failure is a normal part of the process. Remind the client that they are more likely to succeed on their fifth or sixth attempt.

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Session V – Positive Reappraisal

Goal : Open and closed memories are reappraised through four different methods.

Tools : Open and Closed Memories Questionnaire, Positive Reappraisal exercise

Rationale : Personal written disclosure is employed to explore resentment and painful memories and to encourage cognitive processing using your strengths in order to re-file them so that they don’t drain your energy.

The purpose of positive appraisal is not to change the event or the person involved in these negative memories but to refile then in a way that does not continue to drain us emotionally or psychologically.

• Open and Closed Memories Questionnaire

Please answer the following questions to determine if you have open memories:

• Does my past prevent me from moving forward?
• Does your open or negative memory involve someone who harmed you and you find yourself thinking about this person or the consequences of their actions?
• What are the advantages and disadvantages of engaging in this processing of painful memories?
• Have you sought another person’s perspective on this issue?

Now apply the following positive reappraisal strategies to one of your memories:

• Create some distance. One way to create a psychological space between you and your negative memory is to describe from this person’s perspective to allow yourself to revise the meaning and the feelings around it. Imagine yourself as a journalist or a fly on the wall and describe your open memory from a vantage point of a third person while keeping a neutral expression.
• Reinterpret by focusing on subtle aspects of the memory and deliberately recall any positive aspects you may have missed while keeping the negatives at bay. Think of your values in life and how those can be infused in how you remember.
• Step back and observe your memory unfold with a non-judgmental receptive mind and shift focus to internal and external experiences evoked by the memory. See if you can allow your memory to pass by.
• Divert your attention to a different task that is engaging.
• Which strategy was most beneficial?
• Which strategy was difficult to do?
• How has this experience put your life in perspective for you?
• How has this event benefited you as a person?
• What personal strengths grew out of this experience?
• How has this experience helped you see differently what and who is important in your life?

Homework : Apply one of the strategies to a new challenge and reflect on it in writing before the next session.

Clinician notes : A level of caution needs to be exercised when exploring painful memories. Encourage the client to explore a memory that is not too traumatic. Start the session with a mindfulness practice and ask the client to monitor their emotional state.

Session VI – Forgiveness is Divine

Goal : Model of forgiveness is introduced, and the letter of forgiveness is assigned to transform bitterness.

Tool : REACH Forgiveness worksheet and Forgiveness Letter.

Rationale : Forgiveness is a choice, although not an easy one. It is a gradual process that requires commitment. Decisional forgiveness is only the first step. Empathy is key and ultimately forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself.

Everett Worthington (n.d.), leading research in forgiveness, designed a model that outlines the necessary components of effective emotional forgiveness and the worksheet below is based on his REACH method. You can find an extensive discussion of the psychology of forgiveness in our blog.

One model of forgiveness therapy that places empathy at its center and stresses emotional forgiveness is Worthington’s REACH forgiveness model based on the stress and coping theory of forgiveness. Each step in REACH is applied to a target transgression that the client is trying to change.

R = Recall the Hurt E = Empathize with the Person Who Hurt You A = Give an Altruistic Gift of Forgiveness C = Commit to the Emotional Forgiveness That Was Experienced H = Hold on to Forgiveness When Doubts Arise (Worthington, 2006).

• REACH forgiveness

Follow the reach model in your written narrative of forgiveness:

• R = Recall the Hurt. Close your eyes and recall the transgression and the person involved. Take a deep breath and try not to allow self-pity to take over. Write briefly about what happened: ___________
• E = Empathize with the Person Who Hurt You. People often act in hurtful ways when they feel threatened, afraid or hurt. Do your best in trying to imagine what the transgressor was thinking and feeling and write a plausible explanation for their actions. This part is supposed to be difficult: ___________
• A = Give an Altruistic Gift of Forgiveness. Remember a time when you were forgiven by another person. Describe the event and its effect on you: ____________
• C = Commit to the Emotional Forgiveness That Was Experienced. Commit to a gesture of forgiveness, public or private, either by sharing with someone your decision to forgive or by writing a forgiveness letter that you never send.
• H = Hold on to Forgiveness When Doubts Arise. Recurrence of memories will be normal but the reminder you created above will be helpful in holding onto your decision to forgive. Brainstorm ways in which you can support your resolution as well as those that may deter you.

A key to helping a person develop empathy for the transgressor is to help the client take the perspective of the other person. To assist the client, write the five Ps on a sheet of paper as a cue to the client and ask them to answer the questions using the five prompts:

• Pressures: What were the situational pressures that made the person behave the way he or she did?
• Past: What were the background factors contributing to the person acting the way he or she did?
• Personality: What are the events in the person’s life that lead to the person having the personality that he or she does?
• Provocations: What were my own provocative behaviors? Alternatively, might the other person, from his or her point of view, perceive something I did as a provocation?
• Plans: What were the person’s good intentions? Did the person want to help me, correct me, or have in mind that he or she thought would be good for me, but his or her behavior did not have that effect? In fact, it had just the opposite effect.

Homework : Leslie Greenberg and Wanda Malcolm (2002) have demonstrated that people who can generate fantasies where they vividly imagine the offender apologizing and being deeply remorseful are ones who are most likely able to forgive successfully.

Ask the client to vividly imagine the offender apologizing and then write a letter of forgiveness to this person. The client does not need to do anything with the letter itself.

Clinician notes : Although relaxation techniques should be used at the outset and at the conclusion of every session, this one, in particular, is important.

If the client has a difficulty finding compassion for the transgressor, one of the most effective ways to help a client experience empathy is to use the empty-chair technique.

The client imagines sitting across from the offender, who is imagined to be in an empty chair. The client describes his or her complaint as if the offender were there. The client then moves to the empty chair and responds from the point of view of the offender. The conversation proceeds with the client moving back and forth between chairs.

The objective is to allow the person to express both sides of the conversation personally, and thus experience empathy. In doing so, the person might imagine an apology or at least an acknowledgment of the hurt that was inflicted.

Session VII – Good Enough

Goal : To establish realistic expectations of progress. Good enough mindset and concepts of satisficing versus maximizing are introduced, and an action plan to increase satisficing is devised.

Tool : Maximizer v. Satisficer Assessment, Strategies to Increase Satisficing

Rationale : According to psychologist Barry Schwartz (2004), maximizers always aim to make the best possible choice. They take their time and compare products both before and after making purchasing decisions.

Maximizers are more prone to depression due to overly high expectations and fear of regret. Maximizers, like perfectionists, seek to achieve the best, but perfectionists have high standards that they don’t expect to meet, whereas maximizers have very high standards that they do expect to meet, and, when they are unable to meet them, they become depressed (Chowdhury, Ratneshwar, & Mohanty, 2009; Schwartz et al., 2002).

The questionnaire below will help to assess if your client is a maximizer or a satisficer. There are several techniques for increasing satisficing and developing a “good enough” mindset.

• Maximizer v. Satisficer Assessment

Read the following statements and carefully rate to what degree they are true and descriptive of who you most often are. Rate them on a scale of one to seven, where one means  completely disagree and seven means strongly agree.

Now add the scores for your answers. The average score is 50, the high score is 75 and the low score is 25 or below. If your score is below 40, you are on the satisficing end of the scale. If you scored 65 and above, it is likely you have maximizing type behaviors that may impact your wellbeing. Consider some of the strategies to increase satisficing listed below.

Strategies to Increase Satisficing

To make choices versus simply have choices means to be able to reflect on what makes a decision important, what makes particular choice say about you, or even create new options if no good options are available. To practice these skills, try the following:

• Shorten or eliminate deliberation about decisions that are not important.
• Take the time that has just become available to you to ask yourself what you really want in the areas of life where making decisions really matters.

To generally do more satisficing, try the following:

• Recall the time when you settled for good enough.
• Reflect on how you chose in those areas.
• Apply the strategy to another area.

Reflect on what pursuing all the available opportunities costs you:

• Make a decision to stick with a decision to do something unless you’re truly dissatisfied.
• Resist the urge to go after the new and improved.
• Resolve to combat the fear of missing out.
• Adopt the attitude where you don’t fix what’s not broken.

Imagine there is no going back. Make your decision irreversible and final to limit the amount of time you waste processing the alternatives:

• Make a list of reversible decisions.
• Now pick some of those decisions to be made irreversible.

Practice attitude of gratitude and being grateful for what you have and the good aspects of the choices you have made and resolve not to ruminate what was bad about them:

• Pick a few decisions you’ve made to practice this attitude.

Having regrets can influence our ability to make a decision to a point of us avoiding to make them. Make an effort to minimize regret where appropriate:

• Reduce the number of options before making a decision.
• Focus on what is good about making the decision.
• Identify yourself as a satisficer versus maximizer.

Adaptation, also known as the hedonic treadmill, robs us of satisfaction we can get from a positive experience. Combat adaptation and develop realistic expectations about how experiences change over time:

• Next time you purchase something fully consider how long the thrill of owning it will last.
• Vow to spend less time looking for a perfect match.
• Create a reminder to yourself to appreciate how good things really are versus how they are less than what they originally were.

Lower your expectations. Our satisfaction with experiences is determined to a large extent by our expectations. To increase satisfaction with results, try the following:

• Reduce the number of options you will consider.
• Allow for serendipity.
• Ask yourself what a satisficer would do in this situation.

Beware of social comparisons. Practice not comparing yourself to others as quality of experience can be significantly reduced by comparing yourself to others:

• Focus on what makes you happy and what gives meaning to your life.
• Limit the use of social media when you feel the urge to compare your life to that of others.

Appreciate constrains. Our freedom of choice and ability to decide decreases as our options increase. Our society provides rules by which we are limited in forms of laws and norms of behavior.

• Create your own list of rules that you are willing to practice to increase your ability to make effective choices.
• What does your satisficer versus maximizer score say about you?
• If you scored high, what are the emotional or physical costs of maximizing?
• In what way knowing your tendencies can help you make meaningful changes in your life?

Homework : Ask the client to practice one or more techniques of satisficing throughout the week.

Clinician notes : Repetition just like regular reminders can aid the client in creating lasting change. Together repetitive action and repetition create ritual over time. Encourage clients to build new positive habits of thinking and behaving.

Session VIII – Count Your Blessings

Goal : The notion of counting one’s blessings and enduring thankfulness is discussed, gratitude exercise is introduced, and blessings journal is assigned.

Tool : Three Good Things and Gratitude Visit

Rationale : Extensive research shows that enduring thankfulness has many health benefits (Emmons, 2007). In one clinical study, the gratitude condition participants reported significantly better mental health than those in the expressive and control conditions.

This session introduces the client to the practice of gratitude by counting one’s blessings daily and planning a gratitude visit. Clients are also asked to keep a gratitude journal between sessions.

Three Good Things

Before going to bed, write about three good things that happened to you that day. Reflect on those good things by answering the following questions:

• Why did this good thing happen and what does it mean to you?
• What lessons have you learned from reflecting on this good thing?
• How did you or others contribute to this good thing happening?

Gratitude Visit

Gratitude is oriented toward others. Think of a person to whom you would like to express gratitude. Write a letter to them. Try to be specific in describing the way in which their actions have made an important difference in your life. When finished, arrange a visit with that person without explaining the purpose. Try to make it as casual as possible.

When you see them after you settle in, read your letter slowly, with expression and eye contact. And allow the other person to react unhurriedly. Reminisce about the times and specific events that made that person important to you.

• What feelings came up as you wrote your letter?
• What was the easiest part to write and what was the toughest part?
• Describe the other person’s reaction to your expression of gratitude?
• How were you affected by their reaction?
• How long did these feelings last after you presented your letter?
• How often did you recall the experience in the days following?

Homework : Blessings journal is assigned, and client is asked to write about three good things that happened that day before bedtime every night for a week in a way that was introduced during the session.

Suggest that clients socialize with more people who are grateful and observe if that improves their mood. People who are thankful have a language of future, abundance, gifts, and satisfaction.

You can also ask clients to find ways to express gratitude directly to another person. While doing so, ask them to avoid saying just thank you and express gratitude in concrete terms.

Clinician notes : Considerable effort and time to manage the logistics are required to write a letter and arrange a visit. Be sure to provide clients adequate time and support to complete this practice over the course of therapy. You can discuss the timeline, periodically remind them, and even encourage clients to read their Gratitude Letters so they can make changes and rehearse the experience of writing it and reading it out loud.

Be sure clients have the opportunity to share their experiences of the Gratitude Visit.

Session IX – Instilling Hope and Optimism

Goal : One Door Closes, One Door Opens exercise is introduced and the client is encouraged to reflect on three doors that closed and what opportunities for growth it offered.

Tools : One Door Closes, One Door Opens, and Learning Optimism prompts

Rationale : Essentially, hope is the perception that one can reach the desired goals (Snyder, 1994). Hopeful thinking comes down to cultivating the belief that one can find and use pathways to desired goals (Snyder, Rand, & Sigmond, 2002).

Optimism can be learned and can be cultivated by explaining setbacks in a way that steers clear of catastrophizing and helplessness. Optimistic people see bad events as temporary setbacks and explain good events in terms of permanent causes such as traits or abilities.

Optimists also tend to steer away from sweeping universal explanations for events in their lives and don’t allow helplessness to cut across other aspects of their lives (Seligman, 1991).

Painful experiences can be re-narrated as it is the client who gets to say what it all means. Like a writer, a sculptor or a painter the client can re-create his or her life story from a different perspective, allow it to take a different shape and incorporate light into the dark parts of their experience.

• One Door Closes, Another Door Opens

Think of times when you failed to get a job you wanted or when you were rejected by someone you loved. When one door closes, another one almost always opens. Reflect and write about three doors that closed and what opportunities for growth it offered. Use the following questions to help with your reflections:

• What was the impact of doors that closed?
• Did this impact bring something positive to you? What was it?
• What led to a door closing, and what or who helped you to open another door?
• How did you grow from doors that opened?
• If there is room for more growth, what might this growth look like?

Learning Optimism

Think of something that happened recently that negatively impacted your life. Explore your beliefs about the adversity to check for catastrophizing.

• What evidence do you have that your evaluation of the situation is correct?
• What were the contributing causes to the situation?
• What does this mean and what are the potential implications?
• How is the belief about the situation useful to you?
• When a door closes, how do you explain the causes of failure to yourself?
• Regarding your happiness and wellbeing, what were the negatives and positives of this adversity?
• Was the impact of this setback all-encompassing or long-lasting?
• Was it easy or hard for you to see if a door opened, even just a crack?
• What does the closed door represent for you now?
• How did the One Door Closes, Another Door Opens practice enhanced your flexibility and adaptability?
• Do you think that deliberate focus on the brighter side might encourage you to minimize or overlook tough realizations that you need to face?
• Would you still like the door that closed to be opened, or do you not care about it now?

Homework : As a weekly exercise explain and write down your broad outlook on life in one or two sentences and then monitor if daily stressors have an impact on your overall perspective. If so, brainstorm ways to help your perspective remain constant.

Alternatively, to practice hope, ask the client to reflect on one or two people who helped to open the doors or who held the opened doors for them to enter.

And to practice optimism, ask the client to help a friend with a problem by encouraging him or her to look for the positive aspects of the situation.

Clinician notes : The benefits of optimism are not unbounded, but they do free us to achieve the goals we set. Our sense of values or our judgment is not eroded by learning optimism , it is enhanced by it.

Suggest to your clients that if rumination keeps showing up, they consider positive distraction and volunteer the time they normally spend analyzing problems to endeavors that make an impact on the world. Not only will they distract themselves in a positive way but may also gain a much-needed perspective on their problems.

Session X – Resilience

Goal : Posttraumatic growth (PTG) is introduced and practiced through writing therapy.

Tool : Expressive Writing

Rationale : Many patients following trauma develop Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), but many also experience Posttraumatic Growth (PTG). Without minimizing the pain and while respecting clients’ readiness, exploration of the possibility for growth from trauma can help them gain insight into the meaning of life and the importance of relationships.

Research shows that PTG can lead clients to:

• mitigate the feelings of loss or helplessness (Calhoun & Tedeschi, 2006)
• develop a renewed belief in their abilities to endure and prevail
• achieve improved relationships through discovering who they can really count on
• feel more comfortable with intimacy (Kinsella, Grace, Muldoon, & Fortune, 2015)
• have a greater sense of compassion for others who suffer
• develop greater appreciation for life (Jayawickreme & Blackie, 2014; Roepke, 2015)
• enhanced personal strength and spirituality (Fazio, Rashid, & Hayward, 2008)

Positive reinterpretation, problem-focused coping, and positive religious coping facilitate PTG. Although time itself doesn’t influence PTG as it remains stable over time, intervening events and processes do facilitate growth.

James Pennebaker’s strategy, known as the Writing Therapy, showed that writing about a traumatic or upsetting experience can improve people’s health and wellbeing (Pennebaker, & Evans, 2014).

While assuring complete confidentiality, clients are asked to write for 15 to 30 minutes for three to five consecutive days about one of their most distressing or traumatic life experiences in detail and to fully explore their personal reactions and deepest emotions.

• Expressive Writing

Using a note pad or journal, please write a detailed account of a trauma you experienced. In your writing, try to let go and explore your deepest thoughts and feelings about the traumatic experience in your life. You can tie this experience to other parts of your life, or keep it focused on one specific area.

Continue to write for at least 15 to 20 minutes a day for four consecutive days. Make sure you keep your writings in a safe, secure place that only you have access to. You can write about the same experience on all four days or you can write about different experiences.

At the end of four days, after describing the experience, please write if the experience has helped you with the following:

• understand what the experience means to you.
• understand your ability to handle similar situations.
• understand your relationships in a different light.
• What was the most difficult part of writing?
• Do you agree that even though it may have been difficult, it was still worth writing?

Some reactions to the trauma, adversity, or losses can be so strong that we deliberately avoid associated feelings.

• Did the writing process help you see this avoidance if any?
• Did writing help you to visualize growth in terms of your perspective on life?
• Did you experience healing or growth, despite having the lingering pain of the trauma or loss?

Homework : Ask the client to continue writing for three more consecutive days for 15 to 30 minutes each time. Remind the client to make sure to keep their writings in a safe, secure place that only he or she has access to. They can write about the same experience on all four days or they can write about different experiences.

Clinician notes : To better understand the context in which clients are living, the practitioner should continue discussing therapeutic changes with clients without necessarily asking about growth. It also helps to accept the fact that it may be difficult to pinpoint the start and end that marks when growth from trauma occurs.

Focusing on themes of change may help identify when additional support is needed to amplify PTG while keeping in mind that some clients for reasons outside of their control will not continue to experience long-term growth.

Session XI – Taste for Life

Goal : Tendencies toward busy behavior are assessed and savoring exercise is assigned based on the client’s preference and strategies to safeguard against adaptations are discussed.

Tool : Busy Behavior Assessment and Savoring Techniques

Rationale : According to Carl Honoré (2004), we live in a multitasking era where we have become addicted to speed. Evidence shows that people who are cognitively busy are also more likely to act selfishly, use sexist language, and make erroneous judgment in social situations.

On the other hand, research also shows that when people are in a relaxed state, the brain slips into a deeper, richer, more nuanced mode of thought (Kahneman, 2011). Psychologists actually call this “Slow Thinking,” and one method for achieving this cognitive state it to practice what is known as savoring .

Fred Bryant, a pioneer in savoring, defines it as a mindful process of attending to and appreciating the positive experiences in one’s life (2003). Bryant describes four types of savoring: basking, thanksgiving, marveling, and luxuriating. Research shows that savoring fosters:

• positive emotions
• increases wellbeing
• deepens a connection to the meaningful people in our lives.

Savoring requires effort that involves deliberately working against the pressures to multitask. Learning to savor requires time and becomes more natural the more we practice it.

Kinds of Savoring Experiences:

• Basking  is about taking great pleasure or satisfaction in one’s accomplishments, good fortune, and blessings
• Thanksgiving is about expressing gratitude and giving thanks
• Luxuriating is about taking great pleasure and showing no restraint in enjoying physical comforts and sensations
• Marveling is about becoming filled with wonder or astonishment: beauty often induces marveling and exercising virtue may also inspire it
• Mindfulness is a state of being aware, attentive, and observant of oneself, one’s surroundings and other people.
• Busy Behavior Assessment

Reflect on whether or not you find yourself constantly busy and how this manifest in your daily life by answering the following questions:

• Do you multitask or find yourself constantly short on time?
• What are some of the signs of being busy and living life in the fast track: information overload, time crunch, overstimulation, underperforming, anxiety, and multitasking?
• Which ones of these do you experience?
• Reflect on what drives your busy behavior.
• Do you believe that these drivers are internal, external, or a combination of both?

Savoring Techniques

Practice the following strategies to increase savoring. All of the strategies to slow down mentioned here require active engagement. Select one or two of the following Savoring Techniques:

• Sharing With Others: Seek out others to share an experience. Tell them how much you value the moment (this is the single strongest predictor of pleasure.)
• Memory Building: Take mental photographs or even a physical souvenir of an event and reminisce about it later with others.
• Self-praise: Share your achievements with others and be proud. Do so in a way that is authentic and honest in celebrating your persistence in maintaining focus in achieving something meaningful to you.
• Sharpening Perceptions: Focus deliberately on certain elements and block out others. For example, most people spend far more time thinking about how they can correct something that has gone wrong than they do basking in what has gone right.

Brainstorm specific actions you will take to practice one or more of these techniques and think about who will support you or what can inhibit your progress.

Discussion questions : When, where, and how frequently can you use it to increase positive emotions in your daily life?

Homework : Pick a favorite or a different savoring technique and practice it between sessions. Reflect and write your personal list of actions which can sustain and enhance savoring.

Clinician notes : Savoring requires practice and some clients may struggle with savoring practices because they overthink the experience which tends to interfere with their ability to notice and attend to their senses.

The focus of the Savoring practices is positive but if the clients are feeling distressed, see if they are able to put aside their negative thoughts and feelings by using the diversion strategy from Session Five: Open and Closed Memories to optimally benefit from this exercise.

Clients should attend mindfully to all aspects of a savoring experience, including its cognitive, affective, and behavioral aspects. However, tuning in too much to feelings or thoughts may backfire and could interfere, eventually dampening the savoring experience so encourage the client to monitor their experiences for adaptation.

Session XII – People Matter

Goal : Seeing best in others and developing strategies for cultivation of positive relationships

Tool : Strength Spotting Exercise

Rationale : Recognizing the strengths of one’s loved ones has been proven to have significant positive benefits on relationships and wellbeing of those who practice it actively.

Understanding one another’s strengths foster a greater appreciation for each person’s intentions and actions and promote empathy. Ultimately, positive relationships buffer us against stress. The central positive psychotherapy (PPT) practice covered in this session is learning to see strengths in others and creating a Tree of Positive Relationships.

• Strengths Spotting

Answer the following questions about people you have close relationships with:

• Who in your immediate or extended relationships always appears to be the most hopeful and optimistic person?
• Who in your relationship circles has the most humorous and playful disposition?
• Who in your relations is the most creative person?
• Who is always cheerful, bubbly, and smiley?
• Who is the most curious person?
• Who always treats others fairly and squarely?
• Who is the most loving person in your family or friends?
• Who among your loved ones loves to create new things?
• Who is a good leader?
• Who in your relations is the most forgiving person?
• Who among your loved ones shows balanced self-regulation?
• What behaviors, actions, or habits does your partner exhibit to denote the strengths you identified?
• Do you share strengths with each other?
• Discuss any you share as well as ones you don’t.
• In what ways do your strengths complement each other?
• Did you also look at your partner’s and your bottom strengths?
• What can you learn from those?

Homework : If practical, ask your family and friends to take the VIA strengths survey. Create a Tree of Positive Relationships to help you and people you are close to gain greater insight into each other’s strengths.

Encourage clients to have uninterrupted, quality conversations with their loved ones at least once per week.

Clinician notes : To maintain progress, suggest that clients brainstorm a way to celebrate each other’s strengths. Suggest they focus on bonding activities that establish communication patterns, routines, and traditions both through daily, casual ways of enjoying each other’s company as well as more elaborate planned celebrations and vacations.

Session XIII – Politics of Wellbeing

Goal : Positive communication is addressed through learning about Active Constructive Responding and client is encouraged to look for opportunities to practice.

Tool : Active Constructive Responding (ACR)

Rationale : Shelly Gable and her colleagues found that sharing and responding positively to good events in our lives increases relationship satisfaction and strengthens our bonds (2004). When we capitalize on positive events in our lives by allowing others to partake in the good news not only do we amplify it, but also increase feelings of being valued and validated.

• Active Constructive Responding (ACR)

Read carefully the following descriptions of different styles of responding to good news. Check off which type of responses you identify with most of the time.

• When I share good news, my partner responds enthusiastically.
• Sometimes my partner is more excited about my wins than I am.
• My partner shows a genuine interest and asks a lot of questions when I talk about good events.
• My partner is happy for me but does not make a big deal out of my sharing positive news.
• When good things happen to me, my partner is silently supportive.
• Although my partner says little, I know she is happy for me.
• Often when I share good news, my partner finds a problem with it.
• My partner often sees a downside to the good events.
• My partner is often quick to point out the downside of good things.
• I’m not sure my partner often cares much.
• I often feel my partner doesn’t pay attention to me.
• My partner often seems uninterested.

Now let us try ACR in session. We will take turns sharing good news and then allowing the other person to respond. Think of something positive and recent that happened to you and tell me about it.

• What can you learn about yourself from identifying your response style?
• Are there any barriers that hinder you in engaging in ACR? They can be subjective or objective such as your personality style, preferences, and family of origin, culture, beliefs, or interpersonal dynamics.
• Should you already engage in some sort of ACR, what can you do to take it to a higher level?
• If you find that ACR doesn’t come naturally to you, what small steps can you take to adopt some aspects of this practice that are consistent with your disposition?
• Identify individuals or situations that display all four responding styles.
• What effects do you notice of each style both on sharer and responder?

Homework : Ask the client to practice ACR beyond his intimate relationships and use it with family member and friends.

Clinician notes : If the client is proficient in ACR, consider expanding the practice of positive communication into positive affirmations where partners offer each other words and actions that confirm the partners’ beliefs about themselves and behave in ways that are congruent with their partner’s ideal self (Drigotas, 2002).

Ask the client to practice perceptual affirmations where partners’ general view of each other is aligned with their ideal self, where we perceive our partners as trying their best, where we are forgiving of shortcoming and sympathize with the pain of failure, and finally, where we shine the light on qualities.

Ask the client to also practice behavioral affirmations where partners elicit behaviors that are in congruence with the other person’s ideal selves as well as create opportunities for expression of those ideal selves while decreasing situations that can negate them and behaviors that conflict.

This paves the way toward movement in the direction of being the most valuable self through skill development and reflection on aspirations congruent with deeply help hopes and dreams.

Session XIV – Gift of Time

Goal : Therapeutic benefits of helping others are introduced and the client is encouraged to Give the Gift of Time in a way that employs their strengths.

Tool : Gift of Time

Rationale : Helping others and practicing altruistic behavior has been shown to significantly increase a sense of meaning and purpose in life. In addition to making a difference, we also benefit from shifting our focus away from ourselves and indulging in our own thoughts (Keltner, 2009).

Research shows that material gifts lose their charm and value over time, but positive experiences and interactions continue to pay dividends through increased confidence that you can, in fact, do good (Kasser & Kanner, 2004).

• Gift of Time

Think of ways in which you could give someone you care about a Gift of Time. Brainstorm ways of doing something that requires a fair amount of time and involves using your strengths. Using your strengths to deliver the gift will make the exercise more satisfying.

• If creativity is your strength, write an anniversary note or make a gift by hand.
• If kindness sets you apart, prepare a dinner or run errands for a sick friend.
• If your humor is your strength, find a way to cheer someone up.

Write about your experience, recalling the details of what was involved in planning and reflect on how it made you feel.

• What feeling came up as you were giving your gift?
• How did you feel after giving your gift?
• What was the reaction of the recipient of your gift?
• What were the positive or negative consequences resulting from giving your gift?
• Did you use one or more of your signature strengths? If so, which one?
• Have you undertaken such an activity in the past? What was it?
• Did you find that it was different this time around? If so, what differences did you notice?
• Have there been times in the past when you were asked to give the Gift of Time and you didn’t want to?
• Have you been a recipient of someone else’s Gift of Time? What was it?
• Are you willing to give the Gift of Time regularly for a particular cause? What cause might this be?
• Do you anticipate any adaptation, and do you think the Gift of Time might not provide as much satisfaction as it did the first time?
• If so, what steps can you take to address this?

Homework : To maintain progress, suggest that the client performs a few random acts of kindness or consider volunteering for a cause they care about in a way that would allow them to use their strengths.

Clinician Note : Exercise caution if the self-care of clients is already compromised and make sure that their altruistic endeavors don’t negatively impact their self-care needs. To help clients decide on the scale of their altruistic endeavors, explore carefully client’s level of distress and wellbeing as it may reveal their exposure to a potential vulnerability.

Session XV – A Life Worth Living

Goal : The concept of a full life is explained as an integration of enjoyment, engagement and meaning and ways of sustaining positive change in the future are devised.

Tools : From Your Past Toward Your Future and Positive Legacy

Rationale : Cultivation of meaning helps us articulate our life goals in a way that integrates our past, present, and future. It provides a sense of efficacy, helps create ways to justify our actions and connects us to other people through a shared sense of purpose.

Cultivating long term life-satisfaction is closely tied to meaningful pursuits and our lives provide opportunities for meaningful stretches if one is willing to look.

In this final session, we combine the positive introduction with a better version of the self, and the hope of leaving a positive legacy.

• From Your Past Toward Your Future

If available, please read your Positive Introduction from Session I. If not, simply recall your story of resilience from our first session. Answer the following questions:

• From the experience of resilience in your Positive Introduction story, what meaning do you derive today? ____
• Which character strengths are most prominent in your story now that you have explored them further? _____
• Do you still use these strengths in everyday life? If so, how? ______
• What does your story of resilience tell you about your life’s purpose? ____
• What creative or significant achievements would you like to pursue in the next 10 years? ____
• If you were to pick one, what makes it most important for you and why? ____
• In what way will this goal make a difference for others? ____
• What steps do you need to take over the next 10 years to accomplish it? Describe what you need to do year by year? ______
• Which of your signature strengths will you use in accomplishing this goal? ____

Positive Legacy

Envision your life as you would like it to be and how you would want to be remembered by others. What accomplishments and strengths would they mention? What would you like your legacy to be? Describe in concrete terms. _____

Now look back at what you wrote and ask yourself if you have a plan that is both realistic and within your ability to do so.

• What was like it to re-read your story of resilience again?
• Would you write it the same way today? If not, what would you change?
• How has your thinking about the purpose and meaning of life changed over the course of our sessions?
• What was the process like for you of reflecting on and then writing about your goals for the future?
• What will your life look like when you accomplish your goals?
• What might happen if you do not accomplish your goals?
• Think of ways you can use your signature strengths to do something that would enable you to leave a Positive Legacy.
• What specific actions would you take to accomplish your short and long-term goals? What is the timeline for completion of these actions?

Homework : Resolve to keep this in a safe place and read it again a year from now. At that point ask yourself if you made progress, if you need to revise your goals, or if new goals have emerged for you.

Clinician notes : Some client may struggle to find purpose and meaning in their life, especially if they are struggling with a significant loss, trauma or severe depression. Nevertheless, it is very important for the client to be asked about meaning. Irvin Yalom (2020), the author of Existential Psychotherapy states that every one of his clients expressed concerns about the lack of meaning in their lives.

17 Top-Rated Positive Psychology Exercises for Practitioners

Expand your arsenal and impact with these 17 Positive Psychology Exercises [PDF] , scientifically designed to promote human flourishing, meaning, and wellbeing.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

We hope that you found this overview of effective positive psychotherapy tools to be helpful.

What has your experience been using these positive psychotherapy exercises? Leave a comment below. We would love to hear and learn from you.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Positive Psychology Exercises for free .

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I am very happy to see this post because it really a nice post. Thanks

This article is very informative and comprehensive. It has broadened my knowledge and perspective on Positive Psychotherapy. The exercises can benefit my clients as well as myself in the pursuit of happiness.

This is indeed one of the most rarely well thought and designed positive therapy/ coaching exercises which I am certain that will have a good impact on the client. Millions of thanks

This article has made me more effective in my work and I thank you dearly!

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Beautifully executed. Focused on the positive. Clients would feel enthused to pursue it. A positive psychology CBT.

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